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“Peyton,” my sister-in-law chuckled. “How many times have I told you to call me Hailee?”
“Sorry.” Her gaze slid past her right to me. She lifted her chin imperceptibly, but I caught it. I felt it like a punch to the stomach. She was pissed… and her anger was all directed at me.
I didn’t blame her—I’d been an asshole on the roof terrace and again last night at the river. But this thing between her and me, it was dangerous territory. Confusing and unexpected. And I wanted to believe it was all because I’d saved her… but I wasn’t so sure anymore.
She settled her eyes on Fee and said, “I just wanted to grab a drink.”
“Of course.” Fee shooed me along the counter to give Peyton room to open the refrigerator.
“Do you need anything else?”
“I’m good, thanks.”
The air turned thick with tension. I didn’t know if it was her and me, or her and everybody else. But her presence changed things.
When she disappeared out of the kitchen, everyone seemed to take a breath.
“How is she?” Hailee asked. “She seemed okay last night at the game.”
“I wish I knew. She’s gotten so good at putting up walls. She says she’s okay, but how can she be after… God, I can’t even imagine.”
“She’s lucky to have you and Jase,” Hailee added.
“Is she?” Fee’s shoulders sank. “Because some days, it feels like we haven’t got any idea of how to get through to her.”
“She’s been through a lot. It’s going to take time.”
My eyes flicked to the door, but Peyton was gone. I knew firsthand it wasn’t as simple as Hailee was making it sound. I’d had people there for me, but it hadn’t stopped me from spiraling out of control.
Shit, maybe I should have come clean to Jase about everything. But the last thing I wanted was to make it worse for her. For any of them.
“I need a smoke,” I said, grabbing my mug of coffee and making my way to the back door. The frigid air stung as I inhaled a deep breath, but I welcomed the burn. Placing down my mug, I lit up a cigarette and sucked in a big lungful of smoke.
I was hardly surprised when Cameron followed me outside. “I don’t need a babysitter,” I gritted out.
“Shit, Xan, that’s not… How are you?”
“Like I said, I’m fine.”
“I know things have been strange between us, but you can always come to me—”
“Funny,” I arched a brow at him, “because me coming to you was exactly what landed us here.”
“That’s not fair, and you know it. You’re a grown man. You have responsibilities. You can’t keep coasting through life without a plan. Mom and Dad would—”
“Don’t, okay? Just don’t.”
I didn’t need to hear what a failure I was, what our parents would think of me if they were still here. I’d heard it enough over the years.
Taking a long drag on my cigarette, I dropped the butt to the ground and dragged my boot over it.
“You should quit that shit.”
“It calms me.”
“I can think of a handful more productive ways to do that.” Cameron smirked. “Like maybe finding yourself a woman—”
“You’re giving me sex advice now?”
