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“I’ll whistle,” Blake said with a smirk.
“Whom should I shoot?” Annalise looked at the musket in panic.
“Whoever walks through that door. Except for my driver. He will be wearing blue livery.”
As the room cleared, Blake felt the strength leave him. He leaned against the wall heavier, soaking in the reassuring heat from Annalise’s side.
“Blake, are you all right?” Annalise’s voice was filled with worry.
“I am all right, darling,” he whispered and took her hand in his. “Tell me something.”
“What?”
“Anything, I just want to hear your voice.”
Annalise squeezed his hand in hers. She paused in thought. “Do you remember that time you asked me about my most fervent wishes?” she asked finally.
“Yes.” Blake’s voice was hoarse. It was getting more difficult to speak.
“Well, when I was a little child, I made a wish upon a full moon. I wished for a prince. My own prince who would carry me around in his arms so that I wouldn’t have to dirty my slippers.” She let out a chuckle, and Blake smiled.
“Will an earl do?”
“The one who carries me, so I don’t have to step on my injured foot? Very much.”
There was a beat of silence. “When I came back from my capture, I thought for the longest time that the darkness was my deepest fear. I’ve been too long in the dark, and I don’t want to go back. I had trouble sleeping because of my fear. But today has proved that my true greatest fear is losing you.”
Annalise gave his hand another squeeze.
“However, if I let you go from the start, if I let you go when I had just come back… You’d be in Sussex now, or perhaps even in Italy. You’d be safe.”
“I would rather be here,” Annalise said softly. “With you.”
“Don’t just say that.” His voice was a whisper. Blake coughed, and his chest felt like it would burst.
“Blake, perhaps you shouldn’t try to speak… I think something is wrong. We should wait for a doctor—”
“I’ve had worse. A lot worse, my darling. And that’s why I didn’t want to tell you what I went through during my absent months.” He paused, his breath wheezing out with every exhale. “I was beaten, starved, whipped… and worse,” he said hoarsely. “To the point that I didn’t want to live anymore. But I knew I had to. Because I couldn’t die without seeing your face one more time. You saved me.”
“Did they keep you here all that time?”
“No, darling. It was much worse. They sold me to a slave ship.”
Annalise gasped. “Blake—”
“I spent months there working from dawn to nightfall. The things I witnessed, the things they did to me are too gruesome.” He coughed, his breathing becoming labored.
Annalise raised her eyes to his. “Why didn’t you tell me all this before?”
“Because I didn’t want you to stay with me out of pity. Because I didn’t want you to know the disgrace I came to. Because I didn’t want you to know how terrible life can be. I wanted to shield you from it all….”
“I’d rather you had shared this with me from the start. It would have helped me understand you so much better. All this time, I thought you didn’t trust me—”
“Well, I did put your name on the list… But I was an idiot. And it is a diagnosis unlikely to go away any time soon,” he said with a sad smile. “I want you to know that I never meant to hurt you. I love you too much. All I wanted was to protect you from hurt. Well, I’ve failed you miserably and ruined our marriage in the process. The truth is there is nothing more important to me than you. Not even my life. Because you’re the reason I am still breathing.” He coughed again. “Even if it hurts.”
“Blake.” Annalise’s voice sounded far away. He raised his eyes to her. “Blake,” she repeated, her eyes wide and frightened, and that was the last thing Blake saw before everything went dark.
* * *
