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“Royals do not apologize!”
“For the love of God, Odette, spare me the damn rules. I am just trying to speak to you! You! Who I have not had a private or meaningful conversation with for weeks now! Or have you not noticed between all your tutors—”
“Are you blaming me for having tutors now? Did I ask for them! Did I want them?”
“God—ugh! Dammit, will you just listen to me?”
“No! I am sick and fucking tired of listening! To you, to your mother, to this person and that person! I am tired of listening! Who listens to me? When is anyone going to hear me?”
“Me! Now! I’m trying to listen to you and talking to you right now, but you are not giving me a fucking chance!”
“Maybe that should be your hint,” she said, and I froze, staring at the tears in her eyes. “I do not want to hear you explain. I do not want to hear you talk because each time you do, you convince me that it is going to be okay. You make me forget that I am hurting, and that sounds great, but it is not. Pain is our brain’s way of telling us to stop. Pain is a warning light, and mine has been going off every day. Then you come along and kiss me or hug me or tell me you love me, and I am stuck. I told you my very first day here that I couldn’t do this—”
“But you took my hand and followed me here anyway, Odette. You knew it would not be easy, that it would hurt, and you took my hand anyway—”
“Would you have let me make any other choice?”
“No! Because I love you!” I wanted to reach out and touch her, but she stepped back, looking away. “And when you love someone, you do not just let them walk away without a fight.”
“And what happens after you’ve fought and lost?”
“Odette, how have we lost? Are we not still here? Are we not still together?”
She reached up, rubbing her temples. “Do you really think I can be your queen? I did everything right today. I did everything that was asked of me. And from beginning to end, did you see how everyone looked at me out there? Did you not see how the prime minister would barely—”
“I do not give a damn! Those people are not this whole nation—”
“They are the ones who count!”
“I am the one who counts!” I could not take it any longer. I pulled her into my arms. She did not back away this time, but she did not welcome me, either. She avoided meeting my eyes. “Even if every last person in this country was foolish enough, blind enough not see how great you are, not to see how much I love you, how you will be an amazing queen, I would still marry you a thousand times. And they will learn to deal with it.”
“Gale...”
“Odette, I do not care about what anyone else has to say. Hold on to me, lean on me—”
“And make you my whole entire world? Since I have gotten here, I have stopped being myself and instead...instead, ugh! I still have dreams and things I want to do!”
“You don’t think I have dreams! You don’t think there are things I would rather be doing either! Odette—”
“You again! Why do I have to think about you right now! I am always thinking about you!”
“And I, you! That’s—”
“Are you? Or do you sometimes wonder if it would be easier with someone else, with Sabina, maybe?”
“What?” The way she threw Sabina’s name out now of all times left me too stunned to speak, and Odette used that as a chance to step away. Her shoulders dropped, and the look on her face was utterly dejected. Without a word, she tossed me her cell phone.
I was not sure what she meant, nor did she explain. Instead, she walked around me and back to the door.
“Odette—”
“I am tired. I don’t want to yell anymore, so am I free to go, Your Highness?”
I clenched my jaw, saying nothing as she really knew how to cut deep. When the door shut, I hung my head, gripping the phone, which somehow made the audio begin to play. Glancing down, I saw a tilted video of the swans in the garden. I had no idea why she was showing me this until I heard Sabina’s voice.
My mouth dried, and my body tensed with each word. I knew Sabina had to have said something to Odette, but I had no idea she’d go this far. Rubbing the side of my head, I glanced up, only then realizing I’d dragged us into the family portrait room. Of all the rooms, why this one? I stared up at the painting of my brother. The slight uptick in the corner of his mouth and the gleam in his eye made me feel as if he were laughing at me.
“You told me so, right?” I whispered, glaring at his image. “My past would come back to haunt me one day, right? Well, can you tell me what I’m supposed to do for my future, then? It’s your damn fault I am here as it is.”
