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"This," Zeal said. "Celebrate the little moments with her. That is what life is made of, Talin. Encourage her to be excited about this class. I hope she will never need it, and I like to think that I will have the power to fix her injuries before she needs a physician, but let her enjoy the knowledge. Let her laugh about the things that make her happy, be there when she needs to cry about the ones that make her sad, and love her through it all."
"I do," I assured him. "I mean, I will, but I also do. I love her in a way I never imagined was possible."
"And Ela?" he asked.
I chuckled. "When he lets me, yes. I think he's finally ready to let me again."
"Soon," Zeal promised. "He has finally accepted the darkness inside himself. Now, you need to make him proud of it. He's almost there. You see, that is what most never understand. Growing up is a process of becoming. It's about trying things, failing at them, and learning from that. It's about learning who you are and who you want to be."
"So who do you want us to be?" I asked.
His lips curled into a smile. "That is the completely wrong question," he assured me. "I have never asked my priests to be puppets, Talin. In fact, I chose the five of you because, as amazing as you are, I know you will never blindly follow me. You will push back when I need it. To me, that is worth so much more than a sycophant."
"But it doesn't answer the question," I countered.
"Because only you can decide who you are supposed to be," he assured me. "You keep waiting to be told, but that isn't how life works. You know who you are. You understand what things you like and don't. Maybe you're a well-trained guardian, or a better-trained noble-born son, but deep down you know what you long for." Then he leaned in. "Maybe it's time to give in to the temptation to become that."
"Will I lose her?" I asked.
"No," Zeal promised. "When Nari walked into that inn, she had no idea how to tell the difference between a high-born man and a low-born one. She wasn't flattered by your money or your fancy clothes. She fell into your bed because of your mind. She took you into hers because you were brave enough to push your way in - because shelikesthe man you are when you forget to be so proper and polished."
"And this is why you're really here, isn't it?" I asked. "To give me a kick in the ass?"
He wobbled his head from side to side, but there was a devious sparkle in his eye. "Not really. Oh, I'm not about to let the chance pass me by, but it's not why I showed up."
I found myself shaking my head. He was tempting me, and I knew it. I also didn't care, because I wanted to give in. Ever since the guys had said they understood why I felt like I'd failed Nari, I'd been trying to unlearn all the restrictive habits that had been drilled into me. This? Having a god rub my face in it? I was pretty sure that counted as the final push.
But it wasn't his only reason, he'd said. "So why did you show up?" I asked.
"Because my Chosen is as much a Priestess of Action as she is one of the Body," he explained. "I need them to know that. She is my Voice, and a little proof of my faith in her is enough to solidify their faith in me."
My eyes narrowed as I tried to find the hole in his answer. It was a large and glaring one this time. "But you said she's already doing more than you expected, and faster?"
"Mhm," he agreed. "Which means that not even gods are perfect. She is saving me, Talin. That means it's my duty to make it as easy on her as possible. Whatever she is doing, she's doing it right. If healing one of my most faithful helps that, then where's the downside?"
"Ok, and why do I feel like there's a 'but' with that?" I asked.
"But my siblings aren't having as much luck," he admitted. "Savi and Merci are doing fine. They aren't dying, but they aren't exactly thriving either. Will is barely clinging to his existence. Charisma is screaming, yet no one hears her. Their temples are squabbling amongst themselves, with High Priests throwing accusations around and making the divisions grow."
"Wait, they're still fighting?" I asked, because it had been a couple weeks.
Zeal murmured as if unimpressed. "Because of that little show on the Fresh Start. Kinen made a scene. Others noticed. It has been talked about, written up in every popular leaflet passed around society. Temptation is the talk of Calseth right now. Not the other temples - just ours. The other barons heard that Maela is refusing to tithe, and the High Priests are worried it will happen to them next. Fear, Talin, is why they're fighting, but they're all fighting the wrong things and only my siblings are paying for it!"
His rage was growing, but what he was saying made my heart hang. "How long do the other gods have?"
"I don't know," he admitted. "A year? A decade?"
"A month?" I was scared he might admit that was possible.
Thankfully, Zeal shook his head. "Nothing that fast. Letting the five of you see them has helped. It's enough to keep them from becoming critically weak. The problem is that the five of you can't always go and see them. They're all but trapped in their own temples. Just one faithful follower will be enough to prevent them from becoming imagined."
Real or imagined. That was how the gods defined their existence to themselves. To us, it was alive or dead. Same idea, different methods, but just as terrifying, it seemed.
"So what does she need to do?" I asked.
"You," Zeal corrected. "And Ela, Wraythe, and even Anver. We gave the five of you the sight because it shouldn't always be up to her. I made your bonds so that you could grow them between each other. I did not make them grow. You four men were picked to die for her. Instead, you chose to live for her, and that's even more powerful. That's why we gave you the sight, so Nari wouldn't have to do it alone."
"But what doweneed to do to help your siblings?" I asked.
