AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Barrett’s low rumble overlays my words, “You make me happier than I have ever been in my entire life.”
I can’t help but smirk at him, my brother. He’s never been a man of many words, but with Ella I can see how much he tries to express himself so she’s never in doubt.
Ella looks at Owen to find him with a big smile on his face and his eyes glassy. He reaches over and takes her hand in his. “Ella, you’re everything I ever wanted. This life is everything I ever wanted. Now we have the chance to grow our family. I can’t wait to see what happens next.”
“What happens next,” she grouses, “is I’ll grow to be the size of a house. Have you seen the three of you? This baby is going to be huge and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it.”
We laugh together, the joy of the day lingering in the air around us.
“You wouldn’t want it any other way,” I point out.
“No,” she admits with a smile on her face, “I really wouldn’t.”
Our vacation is coming to an end, but tonight is just beginning. We have a lot more pleasure to give to our little lamb. I have a feeling we won’t be stopping until the sun comes up over the water. That’s okay, we can do what we want. We have one more day in paradise to enjoy and if we spend it sleeping in a satisfied heap, so be it.
EPILOGUE
OWEN
Wow. I can’t believe it. The baby we’ve watched grow inside the woman we love is finally here. Not only is he here but he’s in my arms right now. I look down at him and am speechless.
The only other time I feel so at peace is when I’m holding our wife in my arms. Ella is everything to me and now Devon is as well. Devon. Our son.
I’m a dad.
My vision blurs, but I don’t want to cry. I’m not sure I’ll be able to stop it either.
“You big softie,” Ella teases me.
When I look up at her, she’s watching me holding our son with so much love in her eyes. I kiss her forehead as Barrett and Owen come sauntering back into the room, arms laden with flowers and balloons and food.
“You brought food?” Ella’s voice is full of gratefulness, “I’ll love you forever now. Really.”
Colt smirks at her as he comes over and kisses the top of her head. “You already promised that in your vows.”
“Yeah, but I really mean it now,” she lobs back.
I chuckle and when Barrett’s arms are free, he’s right next to me looking down at our son. I take a moment and breathe in our family being whole, being complete, and right in this room with me. I look up at one of my best friends, my brother, and feel emotions heavy on my heart.
I think back to the night at Temptation in Paradise Resort when Ella told us she was pregnant. I’m still ashamed of my reaction and the way fear filled me, but it’s getting better every day. I don’t know why I was so afraid. Out of the three of us, I’m the only one who had a pretty run of the mill family while growing up.
Maybe that’s why I had the reaction I did. So many people would be let down if I was a shit dad, especially the people in the room with me. Now, looking at Devon, I can’t imagine letting him down.
I’m sure there will be times when I screw up. It’ll come with the territory, but I have the support of people who love me, and I have their backs in the same way.
That’s exactly what Barrett reminded me that night in the Bahamas. While Colt soothed Ella’s worries over my reaction, the tears in her eyes gutting me but doing very little to break the fog of fear and panic I was lost in, Barrett soothed me.
He leaned into me and spoke softly, just for me to hear. “You knew this was going to happen. It was just a matter of time. You even supported Ella taking out her birth control implant.”
I nodded and tried to speak past the lump in my throat, “I’m going to fuck this up. I don’t know how to be a dad. I’m going to fuck it up and you’re going to hate me. You’ll all hate me. Our kid will hate me.”
I was in a major shame spiral and by the look on Barrett’s face he was prepared to punch me to pull me out of it if it came down to it. He shook his head, his words measured, “You aren’t going to fuck this up.”
“I am,” I protested.
“No,” there was a bite to his voice, and it pulled me out of the shit I was in for a second, which was long enough for his next words to work through my brain. “First of all, you love kids. You’re good with every single kid you come across. You’re warm and welcoming and a lot of fucking fun to be around.” I wanted to protest or tell him that was part of my concern—that I would always be the fun one and not much more. He didn’t give me the chance. “More importantly, you’re not in this alone. We will all have things we’re good at when it comes to raising our child and any other children we’re blessed with in the future.”
I blanched and thought for a moment I was going to hurl. I wasn’t sure if I would make it to the bathroom or the balcony over the ocean fast enough. I considered jumping right in the water and swimming until I couldn’t swim anymore, but I knew I couldn’t do it. Not to Ella and not to my brothers.
