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13
Nicolette
Okay, so maybe Kris isn’t so horrible. Only time will tell if it was the liquor talking or actually him. Though we did have fun in the store. We kept making the other laugh or smile the whole time. As much as Kris didn’t want the glitter in his house, it very much is. We stripped on the porch, but as we got inside, he made me turn. Probably to see the ink since I have so much of it. He made a comment about being able to work with it. Whatever that is supposed to mean.
Now I’m in the kitchen putting groceries away in one of his tour tee shirts. So I now have Kris King written across my tits.
“So pancakes, is that it, or did you want me to help with something?”
“Um—not, really. I guess if you want, you could mash the bananas. This way, I can get the meat going. I can’t believe you talked me into fucking chicken sausage.” He shakes his head. “Guess it’s better than that rubber shit they call turkey bacon.”
“Honestly, that's all I know. Pop did what the doctors told him. I can tell you how many calories I take in every day.” I shrug my shoulders, opening cabinets and drawers to find a bowl and fork to mash the bananas.
“Least they look out for you. He loves you so much.”
“He’s a helicopter parent.” I mash the banana a little harder than I should as I think about how Pop and Pierce spoke to me earlier.
“Maybe, but if he hadn’t been, I would never have met him, and you might not be here now.” He pulls out a cast—iron pan. “His devotion to you is why I made my donation decision.”
I stop looking at him. “What are you talking about?”
He sighs. “Claudette was holding on, and they were making me decide what to do. I didn’t know. Then I met your dad. Bobby was there every day. Like me, he prayed. He cursed. I knew Lette wasn't coming back but thought maybe it didn’t mean she couldn’t still do something worthwhile.” He broke the distance between us with a hand out tentatively, “That is the only part of her she did not take to heaven.”
My eyes meet his before I take his hand and place it over the shirt above my heart. “I don’t know how to thank you for giving me life. I also don’t know how to not make our interactions awkward. If it wasn’t for you or your sister, I wouldn’t be. In some of my groups, people talked about writing letters and meeting their donor’s families. I wrote letters but then didn’t know how to get them to anyone. I can bring them to you if you want them. It’s because of this gift I’ve been able to live, but I knew even at such a young age, me living meant someone had to die, and I cried for her, for you.” My hand shakes over his. I’m nervous. I never actually talk about my heart transplant. It’s never been disclosed to the media. I feel the tension in his wrist ease, and his hand goes heavier, like a long—needed sigh against my chest.
I lift my eyes to his and watch him swallow. “I made a good choice.” He bends down and kisses my forehead. “She’ll take good care of you.” I’m not sure who he’s talking to, Claudette or me. “Now, how about those pancakes?” As close as he was, he is now gone.
We’re just sitting down to eat at nearly five in the morning. I’m watching Kris take his first bite of chicken sausage when his phone rings in the middle of the table, and the name Cliff appears. I’m looking everywhere but at him.
He puts his finger to his mouth to shush me as he hits the button and then the speaker.
“The fuck—jackass?” Kris says in a slurry, gravelly voice.
“Wake the fuck up. Have you seen Nikki?”
“Sure, five—seven, fake tan, too much makeup on occasion.” He holds a smirk as he dodges the sausage. I chuck at him.
“She’s missing. Took off from the bar.” Pierce complains, so I roll my eyes and pretend to hang myself.
“Wait—you lost her? Dude, you had one job. Go do it. I’m goin back to bed. I was havin’ a pretty wet—”
“Shut up, asshat. She bounced because of you.” Idiot. It had nothing to do with Kris. Well, not really.
Kris’ eyes lift to me in question. “Explain.” He sounds serious now.
“After that stunt tonight, her Cali friends all bailed.”
I shake my head in frustration. They don’t even understand what set me off. They never do.
“Uh-huh. So she decided to do her, and they bounced. Those aren’t people she needs anyhow.” Pretty much. Does it kind of hurt? Sure.
“You should just be careful. Lori was sniffing, thinking you all may be up to no good. Please be the gentleman I know your momma raised ya to be.” If only Pierce knew I was sitting here in one of Kris’ shirts, he’d lose his shit.
“Cliff, you're an ass. I’m going back to bed.”
“Please, man, she may like—you.”
Not!
“Doubtful.” Thank God he isn’t as stupid as Pop and Pierce. Well, at this moment.
“Nah—I’d say she’s catchin’ feelings.”
“Cliff, you can’t catch a feeling. It’s not a fish. You can develop them, maybe even nurture one, but you can’t toss out a line and reel one in. Damit. Now you got me wantin’ to go up the creek.” He winks at me.
I just shake my head and take another bite of my food.
