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That is the condition of my stomach at this very moment. Fifteen minutes and ten tamales in. I’ve been lucky enough to miss the heat so far, but I have to find it if I want to win, or she does so we can call this crazy bit off. I’ve got a glass of milk and some crunchy bread to help ease what I’m sure I’m going to have to endure.

“You better move faster.” Gillian heckles, “You’re girls downed twelve and looks like she’s not ready to give.”

“Is that right? Tink, you doing good there? You ready to call this?”

“It’s all good. I got the extra spicy capacity, remember?”

“Yeah, I know.” I unwrap another tamale and start to shove. My tongue tingles. That’s got some kick. I take a second mouthful and hear a gasp. Was that the waitress?

“Did he get it? Is he crying? You okay over there, Pan?”

I let out a heavy breath. “Yeah, I don’t think this is it I mean, it’s not-” I stop as bite three hits the pit of my stomach. My tongue is beginning to burn, and my eyes are stinging. “I am not gonna cry. I am not.” I insist fishing for my bread. This eating without eyes is not easy. I can’t take it anymore, so I pull off my blindfold as everyone laughs and cheers. Looking down, I see that not only have I eaten like half of the tamale but also all but a single bite of the scorpion pepper. “Fuck me-” I groan, “That is-” I slurp down the milk, but it isn’t helping.

“You should have quit while you were behind.” The waitress, whose name is Michalena, pats my back.

“Tink, be glad you didn't get it.” I cough.

“I doubt it’s as bad as you’re making it out to be.” Looking at her, I realize she isn’t wearing a damn blindfold.

I grab her by the cheeks, getting my burned to cinder lips millimeters from hers. “You are a horrible cheat, aren’t you?” I whisper before kissing her long and deeply. Making sure that I transfer as much of the searing spice to her as possible. I don’t stop until she starts to push me back. “Was that hot enough for ya?”

“I know it melted my panties.” Mariska giggles.

“What panties?” Blue chuckles.

“Well, if I wore them, they’d be gone.”

“Oh, you don’t wear any either?” Nicolette bites her lip. “Do I win by proxy since he ate it then kissed me? I mean, he is still crying, and I’m thinking it tasted fucking amazing.” She swipes her fingers through the damn thing, but I stop her before she can get it into her mouth by sucking them into mine.

I may die, but that’s a risk I’m willing to take.

“It did take a few bites, and since he just saved you, I’d say we have a winner!” Michelena announces, and then a mariachi band starts to play.

The things we do for love.

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