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“You looked so earnest,” Lizbeth explained.
“No, if I am to be the Duchess of Hillow, I expect to be treated and respected as such,” Edwina told them with determination. “And he deserves to pay for putting my father in prison, if even for only a few days.”
Lizbeth gently stroked Edwina’s cheek. “You must be exhausted after all of this excitement. As soon as we’re home, we’ll get you to bed to rest again.”
“Rest will not change the fact that I will be married in a few days,” Edwina pointed out.
“So soon?” Lizbeth gasped.
“He said he was going to obtain a special license.”
“Are you sure you want to go through with this?” Bertie asked, his eyes pitying. “Surely we can get you out of this.”
“I am a woman of my word. We must wait to see if His Grace is a man of his.” The carriage pulled up in front of Haverton house. In the east, the sun rose above the streets, burning off the morning fog. Edwina stepped out of the carriage, relishing the warmth on her face for a brief moment. In the morning light, the fear and horror of the previous evening seemed to fade away.
“Let us get you to bed,” Lizbeth said gently, guiding Edwina up the steps. “We should get you inside and the carriage put away before the neighbors notice and start gossiping.”
“They shall be gossiping soon enough,” Edwina whispered with a sigh, following Lizbeth indoors. Up in her room again, Edwina felt exhaustion take hold of her. Lizbeth dutifully helped her to take off her wrapper and shoes and climb into bed. She started to shut the curtains tightly closed.
“No, leave them open,” Edwina begged.
“Do you not want some darkness to sleep?” Lizbeth asked, surprised.
“I want to feel the sun,” she responded, her eyelids already getting heavy. As she closed her eyes, she felt the warmth on her eyelids, glowing red-orange from the light.
“Ring me if you need me,” Lizbeth whispered, ducking from the room.
Finally alone, Edwina thought back on the kiss Fergus had planted on her lips. He could not have known it was her first kiss. She felt her body respond to him, desire building in her stomach that she had never felt before. His mouth and hands had awoken feelings that she had not known or thought possible. If he was earnest in banning touching and kissing, she would never know what could be possible between a man and wife.
As she fell to sleep, she resolved to test him, torment him, tease him. She wanted to feel more of what she had only tasted briefly. He intrigued her, behind the mask he wore. She wanted to know his story, and why he banned her from asking about it. She would use any knowledge she had about seduction and the desires of men to get him to bend to her will.
For she did not see a monster in him. She saw a wounded man, barricading himself against the hurts of the world, afraid to let anyone see his vulnerability. She would find a way.
* * *
When Edwina woke, the sun was low in the sky, casting long shadows across her room. Stretching, she blinked, realizing the events of the previous night were not just a dream. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes, she rang her bell, calling Lizbeth to help her dress again.
“Ah, you’re awake,” Lizbeth said, smiling gently. “How do you feel?”
“Better,” Edwina said, climbing from the bed as her stomach growled.
“Can I fetch you some tea? Supper will not be for a few more hours.”
Edwina put her hand on her stomach as she came around to the looking glass. “That would be wonderful.” She lifted her arms to allow Lizbeth to pull her dress over her, quietly thinking back on her conversation with Fergus.
“Are you having any regrets over your arrangement with His Grace?” Lizbeth asked quietly as she tied the laces on Edwina’s dress.
“Absolutely not,” Edwina said quickly, moving to her dressing table. “In fact, I feel surer that this is a reasonable solution for everyone.”
Lizbeth sighed. “I apologize again, Miss, if I am too forward. But, I do think that perhaps we could take more time to think about all of this.”
“My mind is made up.” Lizbeth set her mouth into a thin line and nodded, carefully arranging Edwina’s hair.
“Something simple,” Edwina warned her. “I want to stop by the gaol again before supper.”
“Are you sure, Miss?” Lizbeth asked.
“Yes, father should not be alone there for so long.”
