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The fact they didn’t approve of my choice in universities was part of the draw. I knew they’d never come to visit. The nearest airport is over an hour away and Great Falls doesn’t offer five-star hotel accommodations.
And I was right. They never visited.
Not when my best friend was brutally murdered.
Not when I walked across the auditorium stage and received my degree.
Not even to help me pack up the life I had built and return home.
Not once did they step foot here in the four years I spent making this tiny town my home. A town I thought was safe until one night it no longer was. Where everyone knows everything, yet no one saw or heard anything when Sam was murdered. A place I thought I would never leave.
Until the day my grip on reality slipped through my fingers and shattered on the ground. I’ve picked up most of the pieces, but left behind a huge part of myself when I drove away that rainy late-April morning.
I came here an optimist. Anything was possible. My life was mine to mold. I could achieve every goal I set for myself as long as I put in the work.
The reality that life was fragile never crossed my mind. All I wanted was my freedom and the ability to build the future I’d been dreaming about for years. One where I was my doing what I loved, no matter if my parents approved or not.
A life I now have but feels less perfect than I had imagined. The life I can’t get back to until I face what’s in front of me.
You can do this.
It’s only a few days.
Letting out an audible sigh, I steer the car back on the road and pray for strength.
The town looks exactly as I remember it. The sign for the bowling alley, Lucky Strike, is still only partially lit, the last two letters dark against the setting sun. The theater appears to be playing reruns of old favorites instead of the latest blockbusters according to the marque. And Main Street has the same storefronts from all those years ago, including the Java Bean Coffeehouse, a place I spent many hours studying and visiting my best friend while she worked.
It’s not until after I take a right that I realize I’m heading to my old apartment out of habit instead of the Old Town Hideaway B&B where I’m staying. When the apartment complex comes into view, my hands begin to tremble.
Did they ever stop?
So many good memories laced with bad ones.
Parties at Spencer and Jay’s place. Sam and I kicking their asses at beer pong. Moving the couch to the parking lot on warm, summer nights so we could be comfortable as we watched the guys play street hockey. Mia gifting Spencer a stripper pole for his birthday and installing it in his bedroom, only to have it rip a giant hole in the ceiling the first time she tried to use it.
My favorite memory will always be of the day I moved in, though.
Before life became complicated.
I lived in the dorms the first two years and was ready for a place of my own after getting stuck with catty roommates. Girls who only cared about themselves, and no matter how nice they were to your face, talked shit about you behind your back. They expected me to be a part of their little circle at first based only on what little they knew about me.
From California. Thin, blonde, and busty.
Of course, all that added up to me being fake like them. They couldn’t have been more wrong. Which made my first year in the dorms hell, and the second only slightly better after being assigned a new roommate who was also part of their group.
In a hurry to get away from everything those girls represented, I didn’t pack as well as I should have. Most of my things were tossed in random boxes. The lids weren’t taped shut. Some were heavy while others were light as a feather. The worst were the ones that were weighted to one side.
I was attempting to carry one of those when I tripped on the curb as I lifted my foot to step onto the sidewalk. A set of strong arms caught me before I hit the ground, but my box didn’t fair as well. Underwear and books tumbled across the sidewalk, my face heating in embarrassment.
When I finally righted myself, I came face-to-face with the most stunning pair of hazel eyes. Light toward the edges with dark blue specs around his irises. His woodsy smell would have held me in a trance all on its own if his eyes hadn’t been piercing me.
I’m pretty sure I fell in love at first sight that day. My heart began pounding in my chest, begging to be freed as my lungs struggled to suck in even the tiniest of breaths.
Jay.
The man who would ultimately become my downfall. My one weakness. He could bring me to my knees with just a look, and he did on numerous occasions. Each time making me feel guiltier than the last because he wasn’t mine.
I shouldn’t have been thinking about him. Fantasizing about his strong arms wrapped around me. Dreaming of him at night when I closed my eyes.
