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I did my best to hold back my tears after Julian walked away, but it was no use. As soon as he was out of sight, they fell of their own accord and refused to stop. So I let go of all of it. If I'm truly going to start over tomorrow, I needed to.
It didn't help that my mother texted me in the middle of everything telling me she was selling the only house I've ever called home. That I wouldn't have a place to go home for the holidays.
It also didn't help that I could hear Alexis giggling, her happiness floating on the breeze and taunting my sensitive heart.
But the final crack in the dam that caused my tears to flood, remembering how it felt when Julian called me pretty girl. Realizing and accepting that I had been dreaming about him for weeks. That he was the mystery man starring in my dreams.
Knowing that I would never look at him the same again.
Which meant I had to avoid him at all costs.
At least until I stop dreaming about him in my bed.
"Good." Slamming a shot glass on the counter, he fills it to the brim with vodka and slides it in front of me. "Drink and start talking. I may be a bastard without feelings, but I'm a damn good listener."
Doing as he says, I throw back the shot. He takes the empty glass away and replaces it with a red plastic cup filled with punch.
"What's this?"
"Think of it as confidence juice. Talk." The tone of Max's voice tells me he won't take no for an answer. Considering we've never really had a personal conversation before, I'm not sure why I don't just walk away.
"Not much to say. My parents are getting a divorce. Their perfect marriage wasn't as perfect as it appeared. My dad's a cheater, and my mom's selling our home. They've destroyed my faith in happily ever after and are attempting to force me to take sides, which I refuse to do, so I haven't spoken to either of them in two months," I say, letting out an exasperated sigh as I take a sip of Max's punch. "When I came home, feeling broken, I needed someone to talk to, but what did I walk in on instead? My roommate about to have sex. To all my friends coupled up. In love. Acting different. And I know I sound jealous, but I'm not. I want nothing to do with love. All it does is bring heartbreak with it."
Max laughs. Throws his head back and laughs loud enough I'm sure if I turned around, people would be looking in our direction. I feel the tears burning at the corner of my eyes, but I push them back, blinking until I'm sure they're gone.
"Love is fucking stupid," he proclaims. "It makes people do things they would never do. Act in ways they would never normally act. And not in a good way. It's like people forget who they are, what they stand for."
"Bitter much?" I try to joke, but the words catch in my throat.
"I'm not bitter; I'm a realist. The second someone falls in love, they lose their mind. They stop being their own person. They forget about everything and everyone around them."
"For someone who's unattached, you seem to know a lot about the subject."
"I live with Finn," is all he says as his eyes drift over my shoulder to where I'm assuming his sister is still cuddled up with the man in question. "I saw him change overnight. I knew the moment he fell in love with Lo. I did everything I could to push them together, but they fought me. And when it became too much, they finally gave in. That's when I saw the other side of love. The pain that follows. The heartache. The devastation."
"Because it didn't work out. It never does. Nothing lasts forever." Now who sounds bitter?
"Because they screwed it up. Because they didn't talk through their issues. Instead, they avoided each other. They thought being apart, not seeing the other person, would ease the feelings in their chest when all it did was compound them. Instead of moving on, they let the pain and sorrow consume them. All their thoughts were of the other person. They were deaf, dumb, and blind to what was happening around them. All they could see or feel was their pain."
Shaking away the memory,I say the first thing that comes to mind. "What are you doing here?"
I couldn't have asked a denser question. He's here for the same reason I am. The same reason the other two hundred people around us are. Yet, it was the first question that came to mind, and anytime I'm around him it feels like all I do is spew word vomit.
You'd never know I was intelligent if you listened to the conversations we've had over the years. I tend to give him one-word answers. Yes, no, uh-huh, sure. There's really no dialogue. Not for lack of trying on my part either. I've tried to get past the crush I have on him, but I can't seem to let those feelings go.
It's obvious he's way out of my league. Not interested in dating a girl who can't even form a coherent sentence. The same girl who runs away from him if she has the chance because if she doesn't, she'll undoubtedly do something to embarrass herself.
That girl is me.
I'm the idiot with a crush on the Hawks star baseball player. The god. The Legend. With abs of steel I want to trace with my tongue and eyes that a girl could get lost in.
Who has eyes that deep? That taunting?
Julian Chambers, that's who.
The sexy beast who makes my girly parts quiver also happens to hang out in the same social circle I do.
Which makes any type of get-together stressful and often awkward. On my part, not his. He's always calm, cool, and collected. Nothing seems to bother him. At least, not where I'm concerned.
