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20
Happily Ever After
Epilogue
"Hold my hands, sweetheart,"Adam says, extending them to Sawyer as she pulls herself to her feet, her little hands gripping the cushion of the couch. "Let Daddy help you."
Watching from across the room, I have the video camera ready. All I have to do is hit record if today is going to be the day. It's been almost six days since Sawyer started trying to walk, and she's so close to taking her first steps. We've moved all of the furniture to the edges of the room so she can walk from one thing to another, but she has yet to take a step without holding on to something or someone.
The moment she releases the couch and reaches for Adam, I pick up the camera. Watching as she stretches as far as she can, Adam gives in and moves his hand closer. She latches on and takes a step toward him, her feet somewhat unsteady.
When she releases her other hand, I hold my breath and hope this is the moment we've been waiting for. She reaches for Adam's other hand, but when Adam doesn't offer it to her, she stomps her foot and screams, "Dada." He just smiles and tugs on her hand a little, but she doesn't budge.
Our little girl is stubborn.
Want her to eat? She'll press her lips together and scrunch up her nose if it's something she doesn't want.
Time for a nap? She screams the second you walk into her room and place her in her crib.
Leaving the house? As soon as you put her in the car, she starts unpacking her diaper bag if she can reach it. That one wasn't as fun to learn the hard way. I swear there's still baby powder between my seats.
There's only one person she'll listen to without putting up a fight.
My mother. "Gaga" as Sawyer calls her. She can get her to sleep in less than five minutes without a tear being shed. She eats anything my mother puts in front of her. And who do you think she will walk for?
It's the most annoying thing in the world. Especially now that she's moved to town.
I'm going to retract my previous statement. The most annoying thing in the world is that my mother moved to town.
Don't get me wrong. Our relationship has definitely improved over the last year. The anger I harbored has dissipated. Mostly. There are still days when her comments, intentional or not, make the pain feel fresh and real all over again.
Adam claims I'll always feel that way about my past, mainly because I can't change it. He still has days like that. He still mourns the loss of Sawyer on her birthday and the anniversary of her death. I didn't expect it the first time even though Chloe warned me.
Life gets easier, though, and the past, as painful as it can be, is less painful when your future is bright.
"Did you get it, babe?" Adam asks, a proud smile on his face.
Shit. I hope I got it. I zoned out, again. That's the second time this week. Thinking about all that's happened, all we've been through and shared. You would think I'd be focused on tomorrow and the list of things I still have to do before then.
"Let me check," I say, wrinkling my nose.
Playing back the tape, I watch as my little girl takes her first steps, only holding on to one of her father's hands. It's the most precious thing I've ever seen. There's a look of concentration on Sawyer's face and one of fear on Adam’s.
Looking up over the camera, I smile and nod. "I got it."
Scooping up Sawyer, he walks her over to me and sits on the arm of the chair. "Okay, sweetheart. We need to have a little talk now. I was cool with you talking. Turning one was hard on me because it means you're growing up. Walking… that's a tough one on Dad. You need to slow down, kiddo, or you're going to be driving and dating before I have a chance to catch my breath. Can you slow down a little?"
"Down, Dada. Down." Sawyer's little voice is demanding but filled with excitement.
"I don't think she's going to listen to me," Adam says as he sets her on the rug and watches as she rushes over to the couch and starts pulling herself up. "Maybe we should have your mom talk to her."
"Funny. You know that would make her day, especially when Sawyer listens to her, and that would drive us both crazy."
Despite their rocky start, Adam surprised me and welcomed my mother into our family without even asking. He put his foot down when she asked to move in, thank God, but otherwise, she's welcome any time. Which also means she shows up unannounced, like right now, and walks right in.
"Are you ready, Addison?" she asks, dropping her purse and heading straight for Sawyer, whose hands are flailing around in the air, waiting for my mother to picker her up. "Hey, sweet girl. Are you excited to see Gaga?"
Sawyer squeals and wiggles out of my mother’s arms. As soon as her feet touch the ground, she walks over to the couch, without help, I might add, and turns back to make sure my mother is watching.
