AllFreeNovel
Share Us
All of those memories, all of the happiness I once had, were torn away. Me being a kid, left alone after my dad was then killed. Me, a kid, being handed over to the wolves when there was no one left. No one but my brothers and me. Nothing but us and our bond and our will to fight.
I survived the torture he put us through, I survived the beatings, the lashes, the burns, the mind games. I survived being initiated and forced into a gang, a life, that I never wanted. I survived the dark, fucked up things I've been made to do in the name of that gang. I have even somehow survived being forced to run women and children who are in the same exact situation that my family was in. And I did it all, survived it all, made a name for myself, set up a life for my brothers and me, all to be taken to my knees by a fucking woman.
"What am I supposed to do now? I can't take it back, Stone. Everything I've done and said, I can't fucking take it back. I can't go back in time and be there for her. Fuck, maybe if I would have been there, that sick fuck would have never gotten his claws in her. None of that shit would have happened if I—"
"Stop, Nyxon," he commands, making my senseless ramble pause. "It doesn't matter what could or could not have happened. What matters is what happens going forward and you know it. You take it one day at a time. Things will not change overnight but you have to make a decision now."
Pulling away from each other, we lean our backs on the glass wall as I wipe the evidence of my fucking weak ass meltdown away from my face. Fuck, I haven't cried since I was a kid. I'm fully blaming it on the bottle of scotch I drank to myself at the clubhouse before grabbing the first brunette I saw. Thank God she was sober enough to drive my stumbling ass home.
I know I fucked up with that. I'm just thankful as hell that I didn't fuck her. I stopped touching her the moment Ella ran off to her room. I don't know what I was thinking, just that I wanted to piss her off, to make her feel uncomfortable enough in our house that she might leave.
It was a fucking horrible thing to do and I felt disgusting the entire time. I literally wanted to puke when I touched her. The only thing that turned it around for me, washer,walking out, wearing next to nothing. Her stunning eyes locked onto mine, her perky tits and hard nipples showing through her barely-there top. Her perfect legs on display. She's hands down the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen and at that moment, I wanted nothing more than to toss that bitch out and have Ella naked and spread out in front of me instead. Now, I don't know if that is something I will ever fucking get.
And I wouldn't blame her for it. She should hate me.
I hate me.
"Nyx?" Stone mumbles, bringing me back to the present and reminding me of his last words.
"What do you mean I have a decision to make?"
"You have to decide how you go forward from here, Nyx. You have to choose how to proceed. Do you want to explore what could be between the two of you? Do you want to continue down this path of hurting not only her but yourself, as well? You have to make a decision eventually because what you've been doing, brother, it's killing you. I see it. We all see it. But, Nyxon," he pauses, waiting for me to look at him. He holds my stare for a few moments, his jaw hardening the longer her looks at me. "I love you brother, I do, but if you ever fucking speak to her the way you have been again, I will not hesitate to fucking kill you. I will bury you if you continue to break that girl down. Do you understand me?"
Yeah, brother, I really fucking do.
Ella
Wakingupthefollowingmorning, I roll over half expecting to find Maddox still curled around my back like he had been all night. I feel a pang of sadness when I find his side of the bed empty and the sheets cold. Peeling my eyes open, I’m instantly assaulted with overwhelming brightness.
Why do these men not believe in blackout curtains for fucks sake? They will be a must in my new room upstairs.
Blinking past the Come to Jesus situation my eyes are struggling with, I look around the room, taking in its meager contents. The only thing left in here is literally the bed that I’m laying in. When and the hell did they move the rest of the furniture and how did they do it without waking me up? I am not a heavy sleeper, at fucking all.
Orgasms, that’s how.
Right. The three life-changing, earth-shattering orgasms Maddox gave me last night thoroughly exhausted me. My cheeks instantly heat and warmth floods my core at the reminder. I wassoakedfor him. There was an actual puddle beneath me when I moved to crawl under the blankets.
The reminder of the orgasms also brings with it the reminder of everything that led to that.
Nyxon.
Nyxon. Fucking. King.
Grade A asshole and the cause of not only my anger and continual heartbreak, but also, my wet panties. Well, sometimes. Other times, I just want to stab him in the face or kick him in the balls. Or both. Like last night.
I wanted to throw that woman outside, slam the door, and take her place on the couch almost as much as I wanted to punch him in his arrogant face.
I don’t understand why what he was doing turned me on at all. It wasn’t the fact that he was doing it to someone else. I don’t even think it was the fact that I was watching the scene unfold right in front of me. No, it was her moans of pleasure andwhathe was doing to her. No one had ever gone down on me like that and with the exception of the few orgasms Maddox and Gage had previously brought me, I had never screamed in pleasure.
Pain, yes.Terror, yes. Pleasure, no.
Until last night. Last night, Maddox made me scream. Scream in absolute and undiluted, sheer ecstasy. That was the single greatest experience of my life. He was relentless. He found a way to keep me present, for the most part, and I came that much harder because of it.
My core throbs just thinking about it. I want more. I have two boyfriends, I suppose I could just ask for one of them to go down on me or touch me.
But I want more. Like,more.
The thought sends me shooting up in bed. Am I really ready to have sex with one of them? Both of them?
