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Needing to get some space, I trudge downstairs and out the front door. I don’t know where I’m going, but I need to make someone suffer like I am.
I turn back around and head for the cellar instead.
ChapterSeventeen
Roxy
Ifeel sick as my legs buckle beneath me, and I slide to the floor, my head giving a soft thud as I drop it back to rest against the door.
Staring up at the ceiling doesn’t keep the tears at bay. The ones that have been threatening to spill over since the reality of what just happened hit me like a wrecking ball.
Everyone knows angry sex is the best sex, but angry sex with a guy who stole your first kiss and then promptly abandoned you the same night your world imploded? Yeah, that’s the kind of sex that rips you wide open and leaves you bleeding out on the ground.
I know the moment he walks away. I can hear his angry, thunderous steps as he descends the stairs.
My stomach knots impossibly tighter as I allow the sob I’ve been holding back to finally break free.
I don’t know how long I sit there lost in my own head, but a soft vibrating sound stirs me from my place on the floor.
Climbing to my feet, I open the robe and reach into the pocket of the leather jacket I’m still wearing, pulling my phone free, but it rings off just as I get it out.
Not in the mood to talk to anyone, I throw it on the bed and strip out of the robe, dropping it next to my phone. As I pull the jacket from my body, the new leather smell from earlier is mixed with a scent that is all Maddox, and I toss it away quickly.
Looking down at my body, my boobs are still hanging out the bottom of my bra, and the two sides of my now ruined t-shirt flap against my skin. There are red marks, which will be bruises by the morning, on my hips in the perfect shape of Maddox’s fingers. Quickly stripping, I pad solemnly across the room to the en-suite, which is a godsend right now, and ignore the dampness between my thighs. As I switch the shower on, I catch my reflection in the mirror and really wish I hadn’t.
My eyes are puffy, and streaks of mascara have run down my face, and as I tilt my head, I spot several hickies darkening my neck.
“Fucking hell, Rox!” I admonish myself as I lean forward and inspect my neck a little closer.
There was a time when I would have worn his mark with pride, now I just feel disgusted with myself. How could I have allowed my fucking vagina to rule over my head? If I didn’t have cum dripping down my leg and that delicious ache that comes with having been royally and utterly fucked, I’d think I was a guy who’s second head ruled the first. What the hell was I thinking?
Turning away from my reflection, I step into the shower, letting the near scolding water cascade over my body. The raindrop shower head makes the hot water feel like a thousand pin pricks against my skin, and the dull, mildly irritating pain is just what I need to snap me out of my misery and get my head back on straight.
I spend an indeterminable amount of time scrubbing my skin, and by the time I finally switch the shower off and climb out, the water has run cold, and my skin is pink and overly sensitive.
I gently pat my skin dry and towel dry my hair, giving it a quick brush before slowly padding back to the bedroom for the cosy PJ’s I bought. The flimsy babydolls I purchased aren’t going to cut it tonight, and I feel far from sexy.
Once dressed, I hang the leather jacket in the wardrobe and climb into bed, thankful Maddox’s scent isn’t on the inside of the covers.
Snuggling down, I return the call I missed. As soon as I hear her voice, I breakdown.
“Oh my fucking god, Roxy, what’s going on? You never cry, and if this is something to do with those shithead brothers, I’m going to do some serious arse kicking.”
I can’t help the laugh that slips free at her threat of violence and rage on my behalf. Swiping the tears from my eyes, I proceed to tell her everything, and when I’m done, the relief is immediate.
“I honestly don’t know what to say, girl. This is a crazy mess.” I hear her sigh down the phone. “You know that what happened between you and Maddox isn’t all bad, right?”
“How’s that, Jess? I just screwed a guy who broke my heart, and despite everything he and Zak have done to me then and now, I fucking enjoyed every second. It was the best sex I’ve ever had. And I’ve had a lot of sex. What the hell am I supposed to do now? If I stay here, I can’t say it won’t happen again.”
“Well, maybe you can do Zak next time,” she jokes, bringing a smile to my face.
“Don’t fucking joke.” The guy had me rubbing up and down his fucking leg like a cat that’s OD’d on catnip. “Arrrgh,” I groan. “How the fuck did my life get fucked up so fast?”
“Okay, joking aside, let’s forget the hot, angry sex you just had, tell me how this whole thing is going to work with Rogers. Like what’s the deal there?”
“That’s just it, Jess, I don’t fucking know. Maddox told me that the shit at the warehouse tonight is the start of me getting my answers, but answers to what I have no fucking clue?”
“Is it possible that they actually know something about what happened to your mum and sister,” she asks hesitantly, knowing it’s not a subject I talk about much.
