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“No,” he breathes, “it’s not.”
I swallow hard as his face moves closer to me. And then I hear it. The opening bars of Vanessa Williams’s version ofI’ll be Home for Christmas,my all-time favorite Christmas song.
Aaron’s eyes meet mine. He squeezes my hand and pulls me back toward the living room. “Come on, Beautiful, dance with me.”
Warning! Heartbreak ahead! Do not dance with him to this song.
But I ignore the warning and let him pull me into his arms.
I rest my head on his shoulder and let my body melt into his. I breathe him in. This feels so natural. I’ve always loved being in his arms, dancing with him. Nowhere has ever felt safer. Even now. I try not to cry as I sway in his arms.
His head tilts down as his lips find my ear. “You’re my home, Rae. You always have been. You always will be.”
DANGER. Turn back now!
I look up at him. “Aaron…” I say softly. Tears fill my eyes. God, I love him. I inhale sharply. I want to be with him. I want to hold him. I want everything to be okay. But when I look into his eyes, I know it isn’t.
“I love you,” he whispers.
Then his lips are on mine. They feel so good. My heart soars. And then it crashes and burns. Because this is wrong, all wrong. Before I can even kiss him back, I pull my lips away, pushing forcefully against his shoulder.
Why did I dance with him? Why this song? God, I’m such an idiot.
“You can’t do that,” I say. My voice comes out angry. I’m not sure if it’s at me or him or the song or life in general.
“Rae, I—”
I push all the way out of his arms and step back, trying to put as much physical distance between us as possible.
“You can’t do that,” I say again softly, brushing tears off my cheek as I move away from him.
And the best part? Literally everyone at the party watched that happen.
Merry freaking Christmas.
I’m sitting on Joel’s bed when there’s a knock at the door. I’m expecting it to be Sarah, Joel, or Jesse, but instead, Nick sticks his head in. I smile in spite of myself because I have missed Nick Ardito.
He gives me that signature asshole grin as he swings the door open. That’s when I realize he’s not alone. Jamie Henderson, the current starting pitcher for the Ida Warriors and our longtime friend, is also with him. Unlike the rest of the boys, Jamie has plans to go pro, and I’m pretty confident he’ll do it.
“Well, if it isn’t Nicholas Asshole.” His smile gets bigger. He loves when I give him shit. “And Jamie Henderson. To what do I owe this pleasure?”
Nick’s all charming and cocky, but Jamie is serious as they sit down on either side of me.
“We saw what happened with A,” Jamie says softly.
“Yeah, there was a line for people to come check on you, and we drew the shortest straws.” Nick continues grinning at me.
“Nick…” Jamie says.
Nick frowns, then looks at me. “Right.”
“So you saw. It’s not a big deal. You both know we’re broken up.”
“It’s a big deal if you’re sitting up here crying,” Nick says.
I jut my chin out. “I’m not crying.” Well, not right now. I can rein in my tears on occasion.
Nick lets out a little laugh. “But youwere.”
