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“How are you doing?”
He shrugs. “I’m okay.”
I zone out as I watch her.
She should’ve fought for me.
It hurts that she didn’t. It hurts that she’s blamed me or let me take so much of the blame. But at the same time, she’s still shown up for me. She was the one who finally got through to me because she didn’t give up. It’s a confusing thing to reconcile; knowing she should’ve fought more for our relationship while recognizing that she never gave up on me. Maybe it’s further proof that webothneeded not to be together. That feels like a separate punch to the gut, but some part of me knows it’s the truth. We both have a lot to learn. At least I know we can still be there for each other, even if our romantic relationship is a complete mess.
And now I know I need to start standing up for myself, not just with her, but with everyone, including myself. It’s time to let go of some of the blame and guilt I’ve been holding on to.
Rae
“Rae?” My boss’s voice comes through the speaker on the phone.
I grab the receiver. “Yes, Kristen?”
“Can you come to my office for a second? I want to chat.”
“Sure, will do.”
I hang up the phone and head down the hall to her office. The door is open, and she waves me in. I close the door behind me and drop into a chair. Kristen smiles widely at me. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her angry or even in a bad mood. She’s not perpetually upbeat or anything, but she’s calm and easy-going.
“What’s going on?” I ask. I don’t know why I’m nervous. I doubt I’m in trouble, but there’s something a little off-putting about your boss calling you to their office for a chat.
She smiles even wider. “Nothing bad. I got a call today, and I wanted to share what was said with you.”
“Oh, okay.”
Still confused.
“The other night, before you left, did a girl come in here?”
“On Monday, yeah. I never got her name, though. Is everything okay?”
Kristen bobs her head in an exaggerated nod. “Yes. Well,” she pauses, looking solemn for a moment. “Of course, in these situations, okay is relative. But she went home and told her mother about what she’d been through. She told her mom that she felt strong enough to tell her because of you. Her mother called this morning, wanting to thank you directly.”
I smile and tears prickle in my eyes. Pride surges through me.
I made a difference.
“I’m glad she told her mom. She was scared and alone. I’ve been there. I let her talk, briefly connected my own story, and encouraged her to tell her mom. I made sure she thought her mother would be supportive first. She was worried it would break her mom’s heart. I understood that, but encouraged her not to think about it as something that might hurt her mother to hear, but something that would help her to finally let it out. Oh, did her mom mention if they’re going to file a report?”
“She said they’re still discussing that, but she’s hoping her daughter will decide to.”
“Wow,” I breathe. “I’m glad I was there when she came in.”
Kristen looks at me seriously. “I’m proud of you, Rae. You handled that with professionalism and empathy. You knew when to listen and when to talk. You’re a natural at this, and the people who come through those doors when you’re here are lucky to have you.”
I flush instantly and try not to stammer as I say, “Thank you. That means a lot.”
“All right, I know your time is about up, but I wanted to let you know.”
I inhale deeply as I rise from my chair. “I’m glad you did.”
I walk out of the office beaming with pride and gratitude and feeling humbled that I could make such a difference.
This is why I wanted to do this.
