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“Already in the carriage,” Royal said. “I’ll bring Tira out to her as soon as Ainsley says good-bye.”
Ainsley’s arms tightened around her daughter. Mrs. Monroe was a kind and experienced woman who’d already had three children and had been highly recommended by Dr. MacTavish. While Ainsley knew she should be grateful they’d be able to secure her services, she’d barely been able to bring herself to look at the woman. Knowing that a stranger would be nursing her child made her feel as hollow and as a dried-up, weed-covered well.
“Then I will make my farewell, Mr. Kendrick,” Aunt Margaret said, extending a hand. “My niece and I can never properly express our gratitude to you or to your family.”
Royal bowed over her hand. “I’m honored that I was able to be of service, ma’am. Please know that I will always do whatever I can to help you and your niece.”
“My regards to your brother and his countess,” Aunt Margaret said with a nod, before moving away.
Royal looked down at Ainsley, somber ghosts lurking in the back of his gaze. “I’m sorry, lass. I’d give anything not to have to do this to you.”
Ainsley braced herself to carry it through. “No, you’re rescuing us. My aunt is right. I can never possibly repay you.”
“There is no need,” he said. “Just know that I will always be at your service. Always.”
His quiet words were a solemn vow, one she knew he would never break. He was a good man and he loved her. And stupid, stupid woman that she was, she’d lost her only chance to love him back.
“You’re doing the best possible thing for me you could ever do,” she said. “Here, take Tira now.”
He reached down and carefully gathered the baby up. Cradling Tira securely in one arm, he then helped Ainsley stand.
She gazed at her daughter, so secure in his strong embrace, and felt tears begin to spill.
“Och, don’t cry, love,” he murmured, resting his gloved hand against her cheek. “You’ll kill me if you do.”
Ainsley had to resist the impulse to wrap her arms around them and keep them with her forever—her baby and the man who would rightly be her father.
Instead, she blinked several times and mustered a smile. “No, I won’t cry anymore, I promise.”
“Tira will be fine, you may be sure of it. And I’ll send a message as soon as we reach home.”
She let out a shaky sigh. Since it was less than a day’s travel to Castle Kinglas, she would receive word from him by sometime tomorrow. “Thank you. I appreciate that.”
He nodded. “I’ll write every few days to let you know how she does.”
“That would be wonderful. I’ll be staying with Aunt Margaret for another month. After that I’ll be returning to London.” She rested a hand on her baby’s chest and made herself say the words. “Once I return home, though, you can’t write to me anymore. It wouldn’t be safe.”
Ainsley no longer trusted her father. He was on Cringlewood’s side and would take any advantage in pressuring her into marrying him. She wouldn’t put it past him to go through her letters or even intercept them.
Royal’s expression turned hard. “Are you in danger? Because if you are, I’m not letting you return to London. And I don’t give a damn about the bloody scandal.”
“No, I’ll be fine,” she assured him. “I meant that it’s not safe for the baby’s sake. If anyone were to find out . . .”
He still didn’t look happy but gave a reluctant nod. “Then you and Victoria can write to each other. You’re friends, so no one would think twice about that.”
That made sense. They’d already agreed that Royal would tell Victoria and Lord Arnprior the truth. To be able to hear regularly that Tira was safe and well felt like an enormous and undeserved gift.
“Yes, that would work,” she said with a grateful smile. “Please tell her to be careful what she says, though.”
“I will.”
She kept her hand on Tira’s chest as she stared up into Royal’s starkly handsome face. Though she should say her good-byes and step away, she felt inextricably bound to him, intimately connected by the child he held in his arm. In a very real way, they were now family.
“I wish we could have spent more time together,” she whispered. “I’ve barely seen you these last few days.”
He closed his eyes and let out a weary sigh. When he opened them again, her heart throbbed at the pain in them.
“I’m sorry, lass, but I couldn’t. It hurt too much.”
