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I rapidly blinked and smiled. My eyes were burning and tearing up but I fought the urge to run out of the room. “Hi. Iced coffee with almond milk, please.”
“Are you okay?”
God, I wished she hadn’t asked that.
I swallowed as the first tear betrayed me. “Must be allergies or something.”
She smiled, clearly unconvinced as I wiped away a few more drops. Mandy didn’t say anything, though, and went to make my drink.
Cindy laughed and the sound ripped the air straight out of my lungs. I couldn’t handle it. Jealousy pulsed through my veins and right into my heart.
“Mandy. Forget about it. Thanks.” I dropped a five-dollar bill on the counter and bolted away.
I felt like such a fool. This was work. Eli wouldn’t blatantly flirt with another woman in front of me. Of course, he hadn’t known I’d entered the breakroom, and he wasn’t flirting. They had to have been talking business. He was a funny guy when he wanted to be. And Cindy laughed at everyone, including me, who was the most unfunny person around.
I was having this reaction because of what happened the other day in the supply closet and Eli had been ignoring me. As I entered my office and closed the door, I held my breath and counted to ten. Calming my racing heart wasn’t so easy.
If I broke down crying, it would be noticeable on my face. Davina would be worried the second she saw me. How was I supposed to go to Manhattan with Eli and the others? If he was friendly with Cindy here, he’d certainly be on the trip.
There was no way I could handle him ignoring me and talking to another woman.
I went to my desk to grab my purse and check my face with a cosmetic mirror. If it was blotchy, I would leave work early today. I didn’t need my nosy staff butting into my business.
“Boo?” At the sound of his quiet voice, I froze, keeping my back to him. Eli couldn’t see me like this. It would be embarrassing. “I saw you practically run out of the breakroom. The barista thought you might be upset. She said you canceled your order.”
Shoot.Mandy, why did you have to say anything?
“I’m fine.”
“You’re not.” His hands gripped my shoulders. “Did I do something?” The worry in his voice should have made me feel better. He sounded like he cared, like he wasn’t angry at me. But none of it soothed my sad and confused heart.
“I just changed my mind.”
His arms wrapped around me. The gesture nearly broke me. Dozens, maybe hundreds of nights, I had cried over him, wishing to be held and loved. Now here he was doing all the things I’d dreamed about the last three years.
“Boo, talk to me.” He squeezed me tightly and kissed my neck. “Whatever you’re thinking about me talking to Cindy, don’t. It was nothing. Just business.”
That did it. He knew I was upset about him talking to another woman. I felt ridiculous for behaving this way. I wasn’t ordinarily insecure like this. I’d always been confident in my relationship with Eli. But when he chose his career over me and was unrelenting about not starting a family, it made me realize other things in his life were more important. That I could be replaced easily.
He turned me around and took my face in his hands. “It’s always been you, Boo. Real love never dies.”
“It wasn’t always me. That’s why we divorced.”
His thumb wiped at the wetness under my eye. “Tell me why you were crying.”
“Stupid hormones, I’m sure.”
“Liar.” He buried his fingers in my hair and cupped the back of my neck with one hand. Slowly, he tugged me toward him. I didn’t resist as our lips met.
There we stood, lips locked for the longest time, tongues mingling and our hands caressing each other. I never wanted it to end, but this was work. Despite Eli’s rogue behavior as of late, I couldn’t let us go on like this. Even if I wanted to.
I pressed my hand to his chest.
“Yes, Boo, I know we need to stop. Have dinner with me tonight.”
I didn’t want to bring up what happened the other day. Not as he held me in his arms. But it wasn’t forgotten, and at some point, I needed to apologize to him.
“We can’t go back to your hotel. We need to slow down, Eli. I’m confused about what’s happening. My mind and emotions are at war.”
