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“Mick, it’s been twenty years. None of us look the same.” I hadn’t told her about his missing hand.
“I guess you’re right. My hair isn’t dyed black anymore.” She laughed nervously. “I literally have tears rolling down my face as we speak. They come and go in a snap. I can’t believe Justin called. He wasn’t furious with me.”
“Oh, Mick. He’s a good man. He’s made mistakes in his life; we all make mistakes.”
“I know. That’s why I’m emotional. He could’ve been awful about me being with Johnny at the same time I was with him.” Her voice broke as she sniffled. “He’ll take the paternity test. I don’t know what to hope for.”
“What do you mean?” My stomach twisted into a knot hearing my brother’s name. First my mom and now Johnny. Could this day get any worse?
Don’t tempt the universe, Eve.
“Do I hope Justin is Jax’s father or Johnny?”
“Oh, God.” Nausea shot to my throat. Drinking on an empty stomach could be the culprit, but I was sure it had more to do with my dead brother. I pulled over on the side of the dirt road, pushed open my door, and threw up.
“Eve? Honey, are you okay?”
Okay? Why in the hell would she think I was okay? Her son could be my nephew… my dead brother’s child. I was the furthest thing from okay with any of this. But could I tell Mickey how I really felt? Hell no. I had to be the strong-and-resilient Eve, the shoulder-to-cry-on Eve, the make-everything-better Eve.
I hated it!
“I think I have the flu. I just threw up on the side of the road.”
“Oh no! You poor thing.”
“I’ll be fine. How’s my son? Any news on Jax?” I wiped my mouth with a napkin and continued home.
“Markey is fantastic, so much like Matt.”
Fucking hell. First, my mom, then my brother, and now my husband. Hot tears blurred my vision. There weren’t any other cars on the road so I wasn’t a danger to anyone. Although going into the ditch sounded good.
Not really. Too many people depended on me, my boys, for one. I’d never intentionally harm myself.
But it would be lovely to be taken care of for once.
Art wants to be your rock. He’d take care of you.
I ignored my persistent inner thoughts. “And Jax?”
“It’s like he fell off the face of the earth. Maybe he left Arizona. I don’t really know.” She sniffled. “I don’t know what to do, Eve. He could be dead somewhere in the desert.”
Dead rang in my head. Dead. Dead. Dead.
How many loved ones would leave me before I met my maker? What had I done to deserve such a crummy lot in life? I had tried to be accepting and kind to others like my mom had taught me. I didn’t judge people who were different from me. I lived and let others live freely.
Was wanting to be happy too much to ask?
I stopped at the compound’s gate. Maddox waved me in. I drove past him to avoid any questions. He’d freak if he saw me crying. What would I tell him? That Mickey’s son could be my nephew? Or that I was unraveling because I was in love with Art and couldn’t be with him?
“Eve?”
“Sorry, Mick. I’m home. Can I call you back?” I turned off the car and grabbed my purse.
“Sure.”
“Okay, talk soon.” I ended the call and ran to the back door. It was closest to the kitchen and my best chance to not run into Storm. If anything, I might run into Tina and the kittens. But I could deal with them.
“Hi, hon.” Tina looked up from a book she was reading at the bar. “How’d it go with Karma?”
