Page 77 of Until Him

“I think you owe me a free session still,” he mutters, handing me the textbook. “So we better get started.”

With shaking hands, I open it and start to talk, but I can’t get the words out right. What I’m saying makes no sense and Logan catches onto it because his eyebrows meet as he stares at me.

“You okay?” he asks and I swallow roughly. Because I can’t stand it, I can’t stand seeing him so down.

“My dad is Sutherland Reign,” I blurt before I can think better of it. Opening up is so painful and scary. But I want to do it, even if it’s just a little.

It takes a minute for that information to register, but Logan’s eyes widen.

“No shit. The hockey player?”

“Yes.”

Logan sits with that a minute but doesn’t ask any more questions and I can see Curie watching us from her perch on my chair.

Yeah, I know. You let me know how you felt last night by biting my toes. I’m working on it.

I swallow and force the next words out. “I was never what he wanted. I mean, just look at me.”

Logan’s eyes slide over my body, and he purses his lips, but he still says nothing. Jesus, what is going on in that head of his? I want to know what he’s thinking. I’m opening up my fucking heart and he seems like he could care less.

Am I too late?

“Was that not enough for you?” I ask. “What the fuck do you want from me?”

Logan chews on his bottom lip and nods. “Nothing, but thank you for sharing, Theo.”

I push myself up from the floor and stalk to the kitchen and grab a cup and fill it with water from the sink.

“Fuck,” I mutter, taking a long sip. My hands are shaking so badly that I can barely hold the cup in my hand.

Goddamn him.

“You going to come back here and finish what you started,” Logan asks, his voice rough.

I glance at him over my shoulder and then set my cup down angrily and stalk back to him. I snap the book open so roughly that I tear a page.

“Fine.”

“Don’t be mad at me, Theo. This is what you wanted.”

My vision blurs and I feel a ringing in my ears.

“I don’t know what I fucking want! But I don’t want this. You being so cold!” I nearly shout and then start to crawl away because I can’t breathe, but he catches onto my ankle and pulls me back to him.

“Don’t fucking run away from me,” Logan grumbles.

“Let me go,” I say, lamely kicking out at him, but he grabs onto my feet and pulls and then yanks me by the arms onto his lap.

My legs fall on either side of his and he holds me in place with his strong hands as he eyes me. My breath is coming out ragged and my stomach twists.

“Tell me.”

My mouth opens, and I can’t hold the words in any longer. “It wasn’t only my dad. I was bullied, Logan. Badly. For so many years.”

“By who?”

“By guys like you.”

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