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I gulp. ‘But how can you afford it?’ Lois gave up working as an estate agent when Ronnie asked her to marry him.
‘Er, credit card?’
‘Gosh.’ I shake my head. ‘Phew. I wish I had your self-assurance,’ I murmur honestly.
‘What do you mean?’
‘Well, you seem absolutely certain that Rory will say yes.’
‘Of course I am!’ Her confidence seems to waver for just a second. ‘I mean, we’ve already talked about how many kids we want.’
‘Right.’ I swallow, recalling a conversation I had with Rory, when he confessed to me that he wanted to have a family sooner rather than later. At the time, my foolish mind floated off in what I now realise was a completely ridiculous direction. I can see clearly now. It makes much more sense that Rory would want to have children with Lois.
Lois shrugs. ‘I mean, you don’t talk about sprogs unless you think you’ve got a future with someone, do you?’
‘Probably not, no.’
‘Exactly. So anyway...’ She rubs her hands together excitedly. ‘Have you got a cocktail dress? Something really special to wear?’ She eyes me up and down. ‘Actually, I think I might have just the thing for you. Wemightbe able to squeeze you into it. As long as you wear a little cardi over the top...’
‘Sorry? Why do I need a glam dress? Are you planning to propose tome?’
She laughs. ‘That would certainly give the gossips round here something to get excited about. Hang on a minute. I’ll just go and get it.’
‘Get what?’ I call as she races up the stairs.
‘The dress,’ she shouts back. ‘Has Shaun got a good suit he can wear?’
I stand there, bemused, wondering what the hell she’s going on about.
‘What do you think?’ She reappears with a gorgeous lacy dress that looks stunning on her but which would, I fear, make me resemble a sack of potatoes.
‘What’s going on, Lois?’
‘Oh. Didn’t I say? You and Shaun are coming as well. I’ve booked a table for four.’
I stare at her. ‘But why would you wantusthere? This is supposed to be a romantic proposal. You don’t want two gooseberries looking on when you get down on one knee.’
‘Ah.’ She holds up a finger. ‘There’s method in my madness here. I want you to be my wedding planner. And I thought that while we’re there on Friday night, you and I could be subtly checking out the hotel as a possible wedding venue? Killing two birds with one stone and all that?’
I gawp at her as she holds the dress up against me and stands back, assessing its suitability.
What fresh hell is this?
Wedding planner? No, no, no, no, no.
I’ll just have to be straight with her and say I can’t do it. But what reason can I give?
My mind is racing frantically, but for the life of me, I can’t think of a single reasonable excuse.
But if I refuse to help her, it’s going to seem really suspicious...
‘What about your mum?’ I blurt out. ‘I think you should ask her to help. She’d be hurt if you didn’t.’
Right on cue, we hear Irene on the stairs. Her progress is dodgy and there’s a bit of a scuffle when she nears the bottom, as if she’s misjudged a step or two. We hear the clanking of vodka bottles and a few choice curses before the front door is pulled open.
‘You think Mum’s in any fit state these days to plan a wedding?’ Lois murmurs, her smile slipping, and my heart goes out to her. She acts so cool about most things but I know she’s worried about Irene’s drinking, which appears to have got a lot worse recently.
‘Mum?’ She goes out into the hall, just as a draft of air slams the front door shut. She opens it and follows Irene outside, and I hear the clank of bottles being dropped into the recycling bin outside.
