Page 21 of Siren


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“I’m not denying that I am,” I countered. “Hell fucking yeah, I’m hurt. It hurt last night, this morning, three years ago, it hurts. It keeps hurting.” I could feel my chest aching with the confession. “But am I mad? No. I have no right to be.”

“Sure, you do-”

“No, I don’t,” I argued. “I broke his heart first, Saxton. All the guy did was get even, and good for him. Maybe now he can finally move on. Now that he’s felt like he’s evened the score, maybe I’ll stop haunting him.”

“Kincaid-”

“And now that we’re even, maybe I can finally move on, too. Maybe the guilt won’t keep slowly eating me alive,” I went on, reality rearing its ugly head. “Maybe I’ll finally be able to live with myself.”

“Babe…c’mon,” Saxton whispered sympathetically. “You make it sound like you purposely intended to hurt him. We both know that’s not the case.”

“Intentional or not, it doesn’t change the facts,” I told him. “I hurt him, and I hurt him badly. That’s what we both know, Saxton.”

He didn’t say anything for a long time, but what was there to say. I was right, and he knew it. I was getting no less than I deserved for what I had put Fox through, and not just three years ago. When we started up again, I was still keeping secrets from him. He’d been all in like he’d been three years ago, and I had still been holding my secrets close to the vest.

“What are you going to do?” he finally asked.

“I’m going to drink my coffee, eat some breakfast, then take the folder Stone has on Alexander, and shove it down his fucking throat,” I replied as calmly as my emotions would allow. “I just need…a few minutes to get my shit under control.”

“You’re not going alone,” he informed me in that voice that I knew all too well. It was his don’t-fuck-with-me voice.

“I thought we agreed to keep you guys all out of this?” I reminded him.

“That was before there was a real chance of you killing everyone where they stand,” I quickly replied. “I’m worried about you, Kincaid.”

Knowing that I wasn’t going to win this one, I said, “Fine, but we keep the girls out of it. If you guys want to come with me, I’ll…okay. But we protect Rylee, Hastings, and Sutton. Okay?”

“I’ll call the guys,” he said without further argument.

“I’ll call you when I’m ready.” Taking a deep breath, I knew I couldn’t hang up without letting Saxton know just how much I treasured his friendship. “Thank you, Saxton.”

“I love you, crazy girl,” he replied before hanging up.

Setting my phone down, I finally went to make a cup of coffee, and when my phone chimed with a text notification, I was sure that it was Saxton just being Saxton, but it wasn’t.

Rylee: So…r u sure we don’t hate him?

Unbelievably, I actually laughed at her text. Loyalty wasn’t as common as it should be, and I was glad that I’d found it in Rylee Lexington.

In fact, I was pretty sure that I’d found it in all of them.

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