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“I’ll talk to you later this week.” I waved to Laurie and was rushing out the door to catch Lexi. She was already halfway down the block, and she weaved slightly from side to side. I started to jog to catch up to her, and when I reached her, she stopped dead in her tracks.
“I thought I told you I didn’t want you to walk me home?”
“You did, but I don’t listen very well.”
She surprised me as she stepped closer, our chests almost touching. “Well, listen closely to this, Shadow. I do not want you to walk me home, and I am not sleeping with you.”
I jerked back, grinning. “Hey, I never said anything about sleeping together.”
“I’m not having sex with you—or whatever,” she blurted and began to walk away. I caught up and remained at her side for the next two blocks. She didn’t say anything, and neither did I, but once in awhile, our shoulders would touch, and I felt a current shoot straight to my groin.
At one point, she stumbled on the uneven sidewalk, and I took hold of her arm to make sure she had her footing again. As soon as I knew she did, I let go. Not because I wanted to, but because I didn’t want to. Every nerve ending in my body was telling me to get her inside and up against the wall.
I pulled open the main door to our building, and she hustled past me and to the stairs. I began to follow her up, and she turned, grabbing the banister as she started to fall toward me. I was one step down from her, and we were now eye-to-freaking-gorgeous-eye. Her pupils dilated, and I don’t think she even realized that she was staring at my mouth.
“I think I can make it to my door without your help, Shadow.” She said the words slowly, and my hand landed on her hip.
“I’m sure you can, but I’m still going to make sure you get there safely.”
Her glassy gaze drifted to mine. “I don’t want—”
Her mouth might have said one thing, but the look in her eyes said something else. I shifted my hand to her lower back, drawing her chest to mine, and she sucked in a sharp breath. “What don’t you want, Lex? You don’t want me to touch you?” My arm tightened around her, and her hands went to my arms, her fingers almost digging into my biceps as she held on.
“No.” Her eyes locked back on my lips.
I shifted my hand lower, cupping one of her firm cheeks. “You don’t want that—me to touch you? You don’t want me to kiss you?” I said softly as I leaned forward. She shook her head slowly, her dark hair shifting over her shoulders, and I cupped the side of her face with my other hand. “I think you do want me to do those things.”
Our lips were so close, and I wanted nothing more than to claim them with mine, but she whispered, “No, I don’t.”
I pulled back. I’d never been one to take something that wasn’t given freely, and she’d said no, not once, or twice, but three times. No meant no. I wanted the woman, but I wasn’t a total dick. I put my hands on her shoulders and turned her. “Let’s get you to your apartment.”
She didn’t say anything as we went up the stairs, and I stayed behind her to make sure she didn’t lose her balance. We were almost to the landing on the third floor when she spun around and nearly toppled down. I grabbed on to her hips again to steady her. “What’s wrong?”
“Why didn’t you kiss me?”
I chuckled, which made her stare at my mouth again. “You said no.”
“So—youdoactually listen,” she replied and then slowly turned and finished the steps, walking to her door. She removed her keys from her pocket and found the one for the door while I waited. After she had unlocked it, she looked at me, and I saw uncertainty in her gaze. I think part of her wanted me to come in, but there was definitely another part that didn’t.
I leaned down and kissed her cheek. “Sleep well, Lexi.” I started to walk away, and turned to face her, walking backward. “And if you and the rabbit have fun tonight, think of me.”
Her mouth opened as if she were going to say something, but then it closed, and I turned on a dime and made a beeline for the stairs. Damn, why did I have to put that vision into my own head? Fuck! Now I was hard as a rock.
I made it into my apartment and tossed my keys and phone down on the table before I grabbed a beer and plopped down on the sofa. The image of Lexi naked in the middle of my bed, foremost in my mind. Fuck, I could have kissed her; I should have kissed her. Especially after she asked me why I hadn’t.
If I had taken her into my arms at her door and kissed her good night, just a sweet, gentle kiss, would she have changed her mind and invited me in? Maybe I could be peeling those tight jeans down her thighs right now.Fuck—me!
I guzzled my beer and started to undress as visions of Lexi filled my mind, and I climbed in the shower. I had barely gotten wet before I was fisting myself and imagining her sweet little mouth on my cock. Fantasies of her looking up at me from her knees flashed through my mind, and I tugged harder. The orgasm hit me so hard, I leaned back against the cold shower wall to keep myself upright.
Jesus, what was it about her that turned me on so damn bad? As I rinsed off, I decided it was going to be my mission to find out. Perhaps I could figure out the mystery behind her. I’d been attracted to hundreds of women in my life, but this felt just a tad bit different. Maybe if I could break down her defenses, and I could have her once, the fantasy would go away.
I fell asleep thinking of her, hearing her laugh echo in my head, her smile making her eyes twinkle, and I had a feeling that any fantasy of her that I had would haunt me until the day I died.
I rolled over and punched a new indentation into my pillow. I’d felt like this once before in my life, and that hadn’t ended very well. Maybe I should just forget I’d ever met her and find another woman who didn’t make my mind twist and turn. It would be safer, but then again, when did I ever do safe?
