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“Chris, don’t. That’s not what I invited you here for. I’ve been thinking…”
I swallow hard, hoping she isn’t going to tell me she filed for a divorce. I don’t look away from her light blue eyes and grab her hands in mine, waiting for her to continue.
“As I said, I have been thinking these past few days and I want to try. I want us to be a family.”
“Oh god, Trixie. Baby, you don’t know how happy hearing that makes me.” I let out a relieved breath and pull her into me. Her scent wraps around smelling like home, like exactly where I belong.
“I promise you, I’m going to be the man you fell in love with. Anything you want it’s yours. If you want another baby, I will give you our own child.”
She curls into me, and I rub my hand over her back. Her lips press into my throat, and I go hard. I hadn’t realized how badly I missed her touch until now. “Fuck, honey, I want you. I wanna make love to you, my wife, so damn bad. I want us to start over again.”
She nods, peering up at me through her lashes. Her teeth graze over her bottom lip, and I press her back on the couch. I busy my hands, removing her clothes, quickly following with the removal of my own.
“I promise you, no one else has ever had my heart, baby. No one but you.”
“Chris?”
“Yeah, Trix?”
“Stop talking and make love to your wife.”
Chapter 15
Trix
Things have been going pretty good with Chris and I, we’re taking it slow, but we’re back to living together. I never did take that job with Eden, though, as someone needed to be home to care for Lita. I must admit, I struggle around her. The moments she doesn’t look like Chris, I see Lacey in her, and that kills me each time. I’ve been trying to talk Chris into letting me put her in Moira’s daycare, but he doesn’t want her there, not because he doesn’t like the club daycare, but because he thinks Lita and I need to bond.
I want to tell him to take his bonding bullshit and shove it up his ass, but I hold myself back from saying anything. Lita tried calling me Mama a few times, but I’ve corrected her. The last time she called me Mama, Chris was there and he looked so proud of that moment. But the second I corrected her and said, ‘no sweetie, I’m Trixie,’ Chris had flinched and looked at me with anger.
Later that night, he asked me why I couldn’t just let her call me that so I was honest. I’m not her mother, and I’m still struggling with all of this.
Right now, Lita is napping and I’m going through mine and Chris’s room cleaning up and putting things away. I notice a box in Chris’s closet that says ‘Baby Books,’ and I grab it and sit on the bed, looking through it. It looks like Lita’s baby album.
The first page I open, there’s newborn Lita. Instantly I cry. Oh god, she looks exactly like Lola did at birth. I quickly shut the book and shove it back into the box, sticking it back into the closet. I wipe the tears off my face and grab my phone.
“Hey, Trix.”
“Moira, do you have room at your daycare today?”
“Yeah, what’s going on?”
“I can’t do this, I just can’t. I thought I could, but I can’t, Moira. She looks like Lola did as a baby. Every time I look at her, I keep thinking she should have been mine, not the product of a cheating husband. I can’t do this.”
“Trixie, calm down. I’ll send Mason over to get Lita and her things, he’ll bring her to me. Everything will be okay.” She tries to reassure me.
“It’s never going to be okay.” I hang up and get Lita’s things ready for Mason. Once that’s done, I grab suitcases out of the garage and pack up my own stuff.
“Trix?” Mason calls as he enters my house.
“Hey,” I say to him as I walk down the stairs for the fourth time, carrying two more suitcases.
“What’s going on?”
“I need to go. I can’t be with Chris anymore, I can’t be around that baby. I justcan’t, Mason.”
He grabs me and hugs me tightly. “The club will help you out. Get you set up. Everything will be okay. I’ll make sure of it.”
He gets Lita from her room and straps her into his car while I put a few of her things in his trunk. “I’ll leave a note for Chris, so he knows to pick her up.”
