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‘I don’t. I wasn’t sure what I’d use it for or how much it would cost, so Josh showed me how to turn it off.’

Mads rolls her eyes in despair. ‘OK, let’s start her with this package. Is that OK price-wise for you, Charley?’ She points to a contract costing £45 per month. It includes ‘4GB of data’, whatever that is.

It’s a lot more than my pay-as-you-go has been costing me and Mads obviously senses my reluctance. ‘The new iPhone only costs £50 if you take this one, so it’s not as bad as it looks,’ she explains.

It seems like we’ve been in the store for an age by the time we finally emerge. I thought the forms would never end; the phone company practically knows more about me than I do. However, the sales guy has transferred my contacts onto the new phone for me, and set it up so I can get my email on it as well. Thankfully, Mads decides it’s now time for lunch, and we set off for the restaurant.

Once we’re settled at a table and we’ve placed our orders, she commandeers my new phone.

‘I’m bringing you into the twenty-first century,’ she tells me. ‘I’m installing Spotify and WhatsApp for starters, and then we’ll get onto your social media.’

‘I’m not a total dinosaur, you know! I’ve used WhatsApp – we have a group for work. I’m not sure Spotify is going to be much use though. Where am I going to listen to it? You’ve seen my car, right?’

‘Well, it won’t do any harm. Right, what social media are you on?’

‘I’ve got a Facebook account, but I haven’t looked at it in ages.’

‘OK, we’ll start there.’ She starts downloading the app just as the first course arrives. It’s a mixture of different types of mezze and it’s delicious. As soon as we’ve wiped the plate clean with our bread she’s back onto my phone.

‘It’s installed. OK, what are your login details?’

‘I think the account is my email – [email protected] – but I’m not sure I can remember the password.’ I try to cast my mind back. ‘Try Josh4Me4Eva.’

‘Classy!’ Mads sniggers as she enters the details. ‘Yup, we’re in. Wow, look at this! When did you say you last looked at it?’

‘Oh, I don’t know, last year sometime. Josh wasn’t a fan of social media.’

She puts down my phone and studies me for a moment. ‘Why am I not surprised? I’d love to know how he thinks Facebook is killing the planet. Actually, scrub that. I wouldn’t. I’ve been amazed at how you put up with him lately. Am I allowed to say that?’

‘You want to talk to my dad. He feels much the same.’

‘He has been getting progressively stranger, you’ve got to admit. I mean, I wasn’t entirely sure what you saw in him when you first moved in, but since he’s started on the eco-warrior gig, he’s gone full-on wacko. You do see that, don’t you?’

‘Yes, it was getting a bit out of control. Tell me something, have you ever come across a mooncup?’

‘Oh, dear Lord.’ She snorts with laughter. ‘He didn’t!’

‘He did. It was a disaster.’

‘Was there any aspect of your life he didn’t try to control? I mean, surely a woman should be allowed to have her monthly cycle without her boyfriend barging in and mansplaining all over it?’

‘There weren’t many things he didn’t have an opinion on.’

‘So it would seem! Anyway, you’ve got some friend requests.’ She hands me the phone. Sure enough, there are requests from some of my old school friends, plus a couple of people I knew at university. I accept them all, and I’m surprised how good it makes me feel that these people have been looking for me online. I resolve to do a bit of sleuthing of my own later.

Once we’re finished and waiting for the bill, I summon the courage to ask the question that’s been on the tip of my tongue since this morning.

‘So, have you seen him?’

‘Give me a chance! I only got home last night, and I came out first thing today to collect you. But I did have a little listen at his door on the way out. He’s there. I could hear him moving about, and… are you sure you want to know this?’

‘Yes! You can’t stop now!’

‘He wasn’t alone. I could hear him talking to someone, and a woman’s voice replying.’

The tears are instant. ‘Oh, Charley, I’m sorry,’ she says.

‘No, thank you for telling me. Although it hurts like hell, it’s bringing some sort of closure I guess.’

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