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‘I’d be sad, because I would have failed. I guess I’d know that I’d done everything I could and, as you say, I do have a pretty good financial buffer behind me. As long as I was careful, I’d have plenty to support myself with while I looked for a new job.’
‘Well, it seems clear to me which way you ought to go,’ Grandad concludes.
‘If you did take on the café, would you move into Fred’s flat?’ Katie asks.
‘Blimey, I haven’t got that far! Why?’
‘Well, if you moved out, I was thinking that I could maybe get the train over from Paddock Wood after school on Fridays and come and stay for weekends with you. I could carry on helping out in the café on Saturdays and come home on a Sunday.’
‘You could bring her home, Daisy, and we could have Sunday lunch together. That would be nice,’ Nan adds.
‘Hang on a minute, everyone. I haven’t even decided whether I’m going to take this café on, and you’ve already moved me out and planned how it’s all going to be? I’m starting to feel quite unwanted!’
‘Of course you’re not unwanted,’ Nan soothes. ‘You can stay here for as long as you want, you know that. Grandad and I love having you both around. We’re just aware that you’re twenty-four now, and you might want more independence. We want you to know that we’ll support you, whatever you decide to do, okay?’
I eye them all suspiciously. ‘I still think there’s an agenda here that you’ve been working on behind my back.’
Their faces are masks of innocence, but I’m not taken in. The really irritating thing is that it is actually quite a neat solution. I’d have to finish clearing Fred’s flat and then get the work done on it, but dealing with the café would be a lot easier if I were on site. Of course, this only matters if I decide to quit my job at Holdsworth & Speke and invest myself fully in it, and I haven’t come to any conclusions about that yet.
Oh, who am I kidding? Of course I know what I’m going to do.
21
Now that I’ve made the decision, I feel strangely nervous as I walk into the office. My resignation letter is in an envelope in my bag. I’ve checked my contract and I’ve given a month’s notice, as required. I feel like everyone is looking at me and treating me differently, as if they have somehow worked out what I’m about to do. It’s completely irrational, I know, but I feel like a traitor whose guilty secret is about to be discovered. I wonder how Mr Holdsworth will react. Will he be angry that I’m taking the opportunity that he’s given me and throwing it back in his face? I’ve never resigned from a job before; I’ve always been sacked, and they’ve tended to be fairly angry occasions, so I’m expecting something similar.
‘Morning, Daisy. How was your weekend?’ Grace perches herself on my desk and I jump slightly, as I didn’t hear her approach.
‘Gosh, you’re twitchy this morning!’ she observes. ‘Been overdoing the caffeine? Perhaps I won’t invite you to come and make a coffee, after all. You look like you’d be better off with water.’
‘Sorry, you just surprised me, that’s all. I had a good weekend, thanks. We had a big roast with all the trimmings. It was Katie’s last weekend before she goes back to school for her final year, and she invited her friend Bronwyn, so it was fun. You?’
‘Same old, same old. Laundry, cleaning, homework. I feel like I’ve come back to work for a rest!’ She totters off in the direction of the kitchen and I sigh with relief. The sooner Mr Holdsworth comes into the office and I get this done, the better. I don’t know how long I can keep up the pretence that everything is normal.
Typically, there is no sign of Mr Holdsworth. By 10.30 a.m., I’m starting to sweat. What if he’s not coming in today, or he’s sick? I don’t think I can wait until later in the week; I need to do this today. Mr Speke is in his office, and I contemplate asking Rosemary if I can see him, but I’d rather see Mr Holdsworth. I can’t concentrate on my work; the numbers are just swimming around in front of me. Out of the corner of my eye, I spot Rob making his way to the kitchen. He’s bound to know where Mr Holdsworth is, so I follow him.
‘Morning, Rob, good weekend?’ I ask, as nonchalantly as I can.
‘Yes, thanks. Played golf with the lads yesterday and had a bit of a catch-up afterwards. Always good to see them. You?’
‘Yes, thanks. Out of interest, do you know where Mr Holdsworth is today?’
‘He’s meeting a new client this morning. He should be in at around midday. Is it something I can help you with?’
‘Sorry?’ I stopped listening after he said ‘midday’.
‘Whatever you’re waiting for Mr Holdsworth for. Is it something I can help with?’
‘Oh! No, umm, it’s something I really need to discuss with him. Thanks, though.’
‘Are you okay?’
‘Yes, fine. Why?’
‘I don’t know. You seem a little on edge. Are you in trouble? Is that why you need to see Mr Holdsworth?’
‘No! Nothing like that. Thanks, Rob.’ I scuttle back to my desk. That was far too close for comfort. Still, at least I know that he is coming in today. I just have to try to act as if everything is normal for another hour and a half.
‘You forgot this,’ Rob says, carefully placing the mug of coffee on the coaster on my desk.
