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“Barely!” I shout in mock horror. “You almost drove us into that pond trying to get us home. This place isn’t even remotely in the right direction.”
“I stopped in time! You were never in any real danger,” Colton retorts. He turns to face me more, his eyes taking in every single inch of me. “We stayed in this place for hours even after the rain stopped. It was magical here. And beautiful. Almost as beautiful as you.”
My face flushes again at his compliment. I mumble a thank you in his direction, terrified to actually look at him for some reason. He’s never complimented me like that. He’s four years older than me and as much as I idolized him, he always kept a firm line between us. That line is starting to get a little hazy. It’s doing a number on my heart with its starting and stopping like I don’t actually need it to beat properly to live.
“How was Princeton?” He inquires, moving closer ever so slightly. “It looks like it was amazing for you. You definitely seem more comfortable with who you are.”
“It was amazing,” I agree with a grin. “It was freeing to be out of this town with it’s suffocating expectations. I felt comfortable being whoever I wanted to be and not being stuck in a box of who people expected me to be. I did so many things I never thought I would do like eat sushi and go to five parties in one night.”
“This town can definitely be suffocating.” Colt laughs, his arm brushing mine as he shifts. “College was well worth the money just for getting away. I’m glad you got out of that box, you were always so much better than this place. Are you heading back to the city after the wedding?”
“I was thinking about it. I’m actually not sure though,” I admit to him. “I was so sure when I arrived here that I would be gone at the end of the summer. But being back here for a bit? It’s changed some things. I’m not sure that I actually want to head back to the city. I’ll miss Piper’s child growing up, I’ll miss time with my parents, I’ll miss Lucifer.”
I get lost in my thoughts for a moment before he brings me back to the present with a touch of his hand on my face. I don’t know how to react to his touch, he’s never been like this with me. My natural reaction is to lean into him. I want to get closer and bask in his touch, the way his warmth feels against my skin, and the way he smells so close to me. For a moment, I give in to my instincts and press my face closer to his hand. Reality of what I’m doing sets in before I’m ready, causing me to pull back from him. Looking away, I try to find what to say to him.
“My brothers were right,” he whispers after a moment.
“They were right?” I ask, turning to face him with my eyebrows raised in surprise. “Right about what?”
“You’re even more incredible now than you were back then,” Colton purrs, his blue eyes turning dark and hooded. “I’m so sorry that we pushed you away all those years ago. We never should have done that to you, it was wrong. We all just wanted you so much and none of us could figure out how to handle that.”
Shaking my head back and forth, I’m trying to sort through everything he just said and figure out what he means. He can’t possibly be saying that they all pushed me away becausethey liked me! Theyall liked metoo much, so they made me feel like a pariah for my entire teenage years. They took away any choice I should have had in the matter and made the decision to leave me alonewithout telling me.
“Are you being serious?” I finally stammer out. My hands are shaking in anger as Colton nods his head sheepishly. “Why would you do that?”
“We couldn’t risk fighting over you.” Colton rubs the back of his neck tensely. “You’re the type of girl that people start wars over. We didn’t want that to come between us as brothers. Plus, there was the age gap that was inappropriate.”
“You dropped me in the dust,” I grind out. “Because you thought I was pretty enough to come between all of you. Am I getting that right?”
“Kind of.” Colt grimaces. “That’s not how we--”
“I have to go.” Standing up, I don’t give Colton a chance to get another word in as I stomp away.
“Bray, wait!” Colton yells out as I make my way over to my horse.
“I don’t really want to hear anything else you have to say!” I yell back.
I have to keep clenching and unclenching my fists to stop them from shaking. Reaching back to secure my bag, I realize it’s still over by Colton who is now staring at me with the biggest puppy dog eyes.
“Please, Bray. Just hear me out,” he pleads, his eyes going impossibly wide. He drops to his knees in front of me as I stomp my way back over to grab my bag. “Bray, please.”
“What? What else could you possibly have to say?” I grind out, my face completely devoid of any emotion. I’m so unbelievably angry at all of them, I just want to scream in frustration.
“We know we screwed up,” Colton starts, pausing to stand so that he can look into my eyes better. “We were stupid kids who thought there was no other solution that wouldn't lose our bonds as brothers. You were the girl we knew could easily become more important than any of that. As adults we realize how completely idiotic that was and how absolutely cruel it was to you.”
Colton grabs my chin very lightly, tilting my chin up so our eyes meet. The tears in my eyes have started falling over. As much as I want to hide the tears from him, something tells me he should see it. He needs to see the pain that their stupid childhood agreement lead to. The ice that formed on my heart starts to crack ever so slightly as I see the pure anguish my tears are producing in him.
“I know you probably won’t forgive us right now,” he starts, his voice shaking slightly. “But we are willing to work hard to get back in your good graces. You may not ever think of us in a romantic sense and that’s okay. However, we’re all open to that avenue as well if it’s something you want in the future. We’re all willing to go at your pace and on your terms, we just miss you like crazy.”
“Okay,” I whisper, not quite sure what I’m agreeing to. I need to get away from him and his mesmerizing eyes to think through everything he just said. “Okay.”
“Good.” Colton's face transforms with a small smile, turning him into the carefree, fun boy I once knew. “Now, let me help you get back on Lucifer. Here’s your bag too, can’t forget that.”
“Thanks,” I murmur, accepting the bag from his hand. He helps me up onto Lucifer like he said he would and steps back to let us go.
I literally have no idea what just happened exactly. I feel like I just got eight years of answers thrown at me and it ended in a way I wasn’t expecting. The way he spoke at the end suggests they all want me. That can’t be right, it was one thing for them to have juvenile feelings back then. Those feelings should have faded by now.
Like yours faded from back then?
