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Frank wasn’t there in the morning, picking up his normal shift now that I was there. He seemed happy to have me, and I was happy to have a nice place to stay and a job that didn’t even feel like a job. I took care of more and rowdier children for free all the time growing up. Alice wasn’t bad at all, compared to other kids I’d met. She was rambunctious, but that was just a part of the joys of being a child and not having to live up to the conformities that were put on youth as they aged.
It was a sweet gig and I had to keep pinching myself because it all seemed too good to be true. I wanted to believe it, but in my life, I’d learned to wait for the other shoe to drop. Something was going to happen, and I vowed that I was going to enjoy it for as long as I could. I didn’t know what would ruin it, I never did. I wasn’t going to think about it. I was instead going to think about what came next.
Alice got home from school in the afternoon, and I found out that her favorite thing to do was go swimming. The pool was heated, so even though it was chilly, the water was perfect. It was amazing that we had that in common, because we spent most of the afternoon out there. It was good to see her out of the hospital and not in front of a television. That was where she needed to be, right where she was, and I was glad that she was able to relax for a time. It was clear that was what Alice needed, her father too, but he was harder to help.
“What are we doing later?”
“We have to make dinner and then whatever you want.”
“Can we do our nails and stuff?”
I agreed, imaging that she had a lot of girly time that she needed to make up for. It was clear that Frank was a single dad, and from the looks of it and the way Alice was craving female companionship, it would seem that he hadn’t brought any other women around her, besides the nannies that Alice didn’t seem to like for one reason or another.
We had dinner, an easy meal that didn’t take long, and then we spent the rest of the evening playing dress up and doing our hair and nails. I was moving slow still, so it was a nice thing for us to do that didn’t tax me that much. She was seven and had way too much energy. I didn’t have enough to match it, even if I had wanted to.
* * *
I was just puttingher to bed when Frank got home. I was shutting the door behind me when I heard his voice. It made me jump and then he smiled at me.
“Is she asleep?”
“Not yet. She just laid down and we finished a book. I am sure that she would love to see you. She was worried she wouldn’t be able to before she went to sleep.”
Frank thanked me quietly and then went into the room to say goodnight to his daughter. He worked long hours and I was sure that the two of them missed each other. I could see how it could be so hard for him. Frank worked hard and missed out because of it. He saved lives, while at the same time missed out on his own.
I was finishing up the kitchen, drying the dishes and putting them up before Frank came down. He looked exhausted and I asked him if he’d had a rough day.
“It was fine.”
“You don’t look like it.”
Frank looked at me then, really looked at me, our eyes locked, and I shivered at what I saw there. He had so much to say, so many emotions right at the surface for an instant. Then, it was gone, and he smiled.
“Work is always exhausting. It is just the way it is. I work too many hours, and I never did get used to the fast pace of the ER. I had to fill in a few times and it was a nightmare.”
“Well, I am here if you want to talk about anything, or if you need anything else done.”
“You have done more than enough. I should be asking you how you are doing. I know that Alice can be a lot. I hope you aren’t trying to keep up with her.”
I agreed that I wouldn’t even attempt it because it was impossible anyway. I knew that there was no way that I could keep up. Alice was a force of nature, like most kids her age.
“Would you like me to take a look at your bandage? I haven’t since you left the hospital. We should really keep an eye on it.”
I was feeling fine, and I knew that he wasn’t actually worried about the incisions anymore. They had practically healed up. I was healing quite nicely, but when a cute doctor says that he wants to get up close and personal, it was hard to say no.
“Okay.”
“Why don’t we go into the living room?”
“The lighting is probably better in here.”
Frank agreed, but he was disappointed in a way. I didn’t know why that was, but I could see that his pupils were dilated, and his stormy eyes were getting darker by the minute.
10
Frank
Ishouldn’t have offered an impromptu check-up, but the offer had come out before I could stop it. I wanted to get her naked, underneath me, calling out my name, but that wasn’t to be. This was as close as I was going to get. I should have felt bad that I was taking advantage of her, my status, but I didn’t. That should have been all the answer that I needed. There was no way that I was supposed to be touching her like I was. I wasn’t supposed to want to do it as badly as I did. Everything inside of me wanted her and it was a crying shame that I couldn’t have her.
