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“What?”
“She was trying to get away from me, Paisley. She wasn’t looking and stepped into the street.”
“Seb, this is not your fault. It was an accident.”
“She wouldn’t have been out here if it wasn’t for me.”
“Hey. Stop it. This isn’t your fault,” she repeats, wiping her tears away. “She’s going to need you, Seb. You have to be strong for her.”
I shake my head. “I don’t think she wants me anywhere near her.”
“She loves you, Seb.”
“God, I hope so. I love her so much, Paisley.”
“She knows that. I promise you.”
I don’t answer her. I don’t know what to say.
I’m numb as I watch them load Taylor onto a spinal board. There’s an oxygen mask over her face and a line in the back of her hand. They load her into the back of the ambulance and Cade jogs over to us.
“They’ve given her something to keep her calm until they can get her to the emergency room. Her leg is broken, and they think she might have fractured her pelvis,” Cade says.
I lean forward and rest my hands on my legs. I can’t catch my breath, and I desperately drag in mouthfuls of air. Cade puts his hand on my shoulder and squeezes.
“You can go in the ambulance with her. We’ll follow.”
“Is she going to be okay?” I ask him. When he doesn’t answer, I stand up. “Cade?”
“We’ll know more when they get her to the hospital. I wish I could say yes, Seb.”
Paisley bursts into tears and Nash pulls her into his arms.
“I’ll see you at the hospital,” I whisper before walking away from them and toward the ambulance.
I feel like I’m on autopilot as I climb into the back of the ambulance and sit on the pull-down seat the EMT points to. Seeing what happened to her and how violent the accident was, I know the human body isn’t meant to be able to endure that. I’m praying for a miracle. I can’t live in a world where she doesn’t exist.
* * *
It’s been hours since Taylor arrived at the emergency room. They wheeled her into trauma and I haven’t seen her since. Everyone arrived minutes after we did, along with my parents, and we’re all sitting in silence in the waiting room. The doctor came out not long after we arrived to tell us they were taking her into surgery. Imaging showed she hadn’t broken her pelvis, but she had ruptured her spleen, causing internal bleeding. They needed to operate.
“How are you doing?” Sophie asks as she moves to sit next to me on the uncomfortable plastic chairs.
I close my eyes and drop my head into my hands. “What am I going to do if I lose her?” I whisper.
She takes my hand in hers. “Look at me.” I reluctantly raise my eyes to hers. “You aren’t going to lose her.”
I shake my head. “You didn’t see how she was thrown into the air.” I bite back a sob and close my eyes. “I keep seeing it over and over again. It’s all my fault. We were arguing. She was trying to get away from me.”
She squeezes my hand. “What were you arguing about?”
I shrug. “It doesn’t matter now. Nothing matters if she doesn’t make it.”
“She’s going to make it, Seb.”
“God, I hope so.”
I pull my hand from hers and pace the waiting room. I feel useless sitting here doing nothing while she fights for her life in surgery.
