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‘Alfred was actually the one that asked for my first pleasure. His sister lives out of town, and once in a while, he leaves the mansion for a few days to go visit.
‘I personally used to dread those days. It made me feel alone. Like I could get lost at any time.’
‘But don’t you have other employees, plus the security at the gate?’ I used to see other people around the house. Alfred was indeed the one who coordinated everyone, but the staff around the house could form a small army.
‘I do. But he’s the only one I talk to. The only one that I’m close to, and I’m pretty sure the only one that cares.
‘I like knowing he’s around.
‘I know it sounds weird, but it’s like he’s one of the few people that could protect me from myself.
‘And since he had to leave, he tried to replace his presence with a distraction.
‘I wasn’t able to get close to anyone since what happened with my parents. I couldn’t bare anyone asking any questions about that night, and any kind of interaction with someone in this city would have brought just that.
‘The Pleasure Room was different. No one would ask any questions. It felt safe, judging from that point.’ Ferris stopped for a second, filling his lungs with all the air he could get, like the oxygen would give him some strength to go on. ‘Are you sure you want me to go on?’
No, I wasn’t sure.
In fact, I wanted him to stop that very second, but my conscience would never forgive me for that. ‘Positive.’
‘Okay. Just remember you were the one that asked.’
I nodded. I couldn’t do anything else anyway since my body seemed to have frozen waiting for what was coming next.
‘Jesus, let’s get this over with.
‘The first Pleasure was supposed to be company through the night, much similar to what I initially asked from you.
‘Fuck, I remember I wanted her so badly to leave, at first.
‘I stopped myself from telling her she should go back through the door countless times.
‘I made her sit on an armchair for so long that I thought she was also becoming a piece of furniture. That was until she dismissed my initial request and started talking.
‘She was bright, though not exactly a genius, but I guess being alone for so long had its effect on me.
‘We talked about random things. Well, she did most of the talking. That was till she made me a proposal.
‘She wanted me to add an extra zero to the sum in exchange for... in exchange for her body.
And I didn’t say no.’
He paused as if he was expecting me to say something. But there wasn’t anything I could say to him at that time. I couldn’t judge him, especially since I know him to be capable of way worse things than that.
‘It felt weird. Like I didn’t even want her there, but my body needed what she was putting on the table.
‘I had sex with her that night.
‘100% mechanical and 100% addictive.
‘I wasn’t addicted to the sex.
‘I was addicted to the control.
‘To the adrenaline itself.
‘I never requested that girl again. But more followed, pushing all boundaries and using them to try and defeat my fears or even test new ones. Until I found myself yearning to take a glimpse at the fear in their own eyes. Like that would bring life into mine—’
