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I expect it to be Fielder, for him to say something high handed like, ‘You can’t run from us, Sweeney,’ but it’s actually Ezra who asks, “are you alright?”
Snorting out a laugh, I shake my head. “I’m fine. In fact, in the three days since I left you, I haven’t been attacked once. No one has found me, no witch hunters or coven members. I haven’t stumbled through any weird portals. I haven’t been hexed or nearly killed. Honestly, I’m fucking fantastic, Ez. Thanks for asking.”
I’m being a little shitty, I understand that. He’s only worried about me. He’s always worried about me, always wants to take care of me. But it doesn’t change the fact that my statement is true. I am fine. I haven’t been attacked.
I feel Fielder’s assessing gaze on me. “You’re going to see your father?”
I give a jerky nod. “Visiting hours start soon, so let’s just get this over with.”
Gideon tilts his head. “Get what over with, sweetheart?”
I wave a hand between us as I push to my feet again. “You all telling me I can’t leave you, that it’s not safe, that you are only trying to protect me. You’ll try lying and say you’re willing to learn to share.” My eyes dart to Cohen, then back to the four boys who started this all. “You’ll tell me you’re going to work together to get along and hope that I believe you. And then you’re going to tell me I have to show up tomorrow to start my trials to join your stupid coven.”
With each word I say, I know I’m right. This is exactly what they were going to do. Except for Cohen, who probably wouldn’t throw his weight behind the whole me needing to join Septem Stellae.
Fielder’s jaw tightens. “You do need to show up tomorrow, Sweeney. There will be consequences if you don’t.”
“And not from us, love,” Hardin says, reaching out like he might brush his fingers over my arm, but stopping just short of actually touching me. “They expect you to be there. You applied for a position. They extended an invitation for you to try. You can’t just back out.”
“Why can’t I? I don’t want to go. I don’t want to be a part of your vicious group. I want to… I want to have freedom to figure out my shit on my own. Without them telling me what I can and can’t do or learn. I deserve that chance.” I swear I see Cohen’s chest puff up like he’s proud of me and some part of me glows at that. But another part of me is still hurt and angry.
I sigh and shake my head again. “I don’t want to be a part of a group where you have to think about them first, about protecting a bunch of power hungry sadistic assholes before you can save your girlfriend from witch hunters. The four of you established your loyalty a long fucking time ago. Even knowing what the elders are planning to do to me, that they’re trying to kill me, isn’t enough to break what’s ingrained in you. I can’t be with men that are going to put that organization before me. I just can’t.”
“You know that’s not the case with me, wildcard. I want you to be free, to learn as much as you can, to be as powerful as you can be all on your own.” Cohen’s icy green gaze is focused on my face, arms crossed over his massive chest.
I nod, giving him a small smile. “I know. But you… have your own agenda and I don’t know what it is, Cohen. You won’t tell me. You don’t trust me enough to tell me. And that’s fine. But I can’t… I can’t trust you totally, either.”
I look at all five of them now. “So unless you have something else to tell me, something that isn’t what I already said, I have to go and see my father.”
“Love,” Hardin starts, but Fielder grips his arm to stop him.
The blond man’s jaw is tight. “You don’t want to be with us. That’s fine, Sweeney. We won’t force you to be in a relationship with us. We don’t want you to resent us or hate us, not again. But you have to believe me when I say if you do not show up tomorrow, they will find you anyway and they will drag you to the trials whether you like it or not.”
Kohaku growls in his throat, a warning sound if I ever heard one. “They can try, but they will fail. No one will force Rosalind to do anything while I am bound to her.”
Cohen’s icy green eyes flick from me to the kitsune, a little crease forming between his brows, then his gaze wanders to the rumpled sheets on the bed and his expression turns knowing. I refuse to be embarrassed about taking my relationship with Kohaku to the next level, so I arch a brow at him when he grins at me.
Gideon reaches out to draw my attention to him. “Ro, sweetheart, we’ll do what we can to keep you safe, you know that-”
“I don’t know that!” I cut him off. “I don’t know that because you protected your identities and left me with witch hunters to betortured. What are you going to do if one of the elders tells you to kill me? Tells you to look the other way while someone else kills me? What are you going to do if witch hunters find me again? Leave me there to fucking die, right? Because protecting the corrupt coven you came from is more important.”
My shoulders sag and I run a hand down my face. “I can’t- I understand that it’s the way you were raised and that on some level you care about the coven and protecting your knowledge and keeping its members safe. I understand that not everyone is as much of an asshole as your dad, Fielder. But you have to let me go. If that’s your choice, to stay with them, to protect them. Let me go so I can build a life away from them, away from you.”
I don’t wait for them to answer or say anything else. Just hoist my bag onto my shoulder, push through them and head to Kohaku. “Let’s go. I’m going to be late as it is.”
My kitsune nods and hands me the to-go cup of coffee in his hand before lacing the fingers of our free hands together. He guides me out of the room and to our rental car, releasing me to open the door for me.
A gentle hand on my arm stops me, and I know without looking it’s Cohen. He turns me to face him, hands sliding up my arm to cup my cheek. “I’ll tell you, wildcard. Whatever you need to know, I’ll tell you. I’m sorry I didn’t before. It wasn’t… I’m not a very open person.”
I frown as Kohaku shifts on his feet. Behind Cohen I see the four Seven Stars witches watching us. “You told me about Suzie.”
“She was part of the group that tortured you. It was the least I can do.” He gives me a soft smile. “Go talk to your father and when you’re done with that, I’ll tell you everything, okay?”
I nod, my teeth sinking into my lower lip. “How pissed are you I left?”
He shakes his head, his thumb brushing along my lower lip. “I’m not.” At my disbelieving look, he chuckles, thumb smoothing over my cheek. “I told you I’d give you whatever you need, wildcard. If you need space, if you need to run from me, that’s okay.” He leans forward until his forehead presses to mine. “So long as you’re okay with me chasing you.”
A small smile curls my lips as a shiver works its way over my spine. “I think I’m okay with that.”
