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For years I always thought I would hate this. After what Harvey did, I never thought affection or sex was in the cards for me, but I can’t deny that my body wants Camden. I want his mouth on mine and his hands admiring my body. In his hold, I feel cherished.
After nipping at my chest, he comes back up and stares into my eyes. “I’m gonna go slow, baby, but I need you to tell me if anything is too much. Can you do that for me?”
I nod.
He kisses my lips. “I need words, babe.”
“Y-yes. I’m ready, Camden.”
He smiles and kisses my lips again before moving his hand down the side of my body and settling between my legs. They fall open automatically with the anticipation of his touch. While still kissing me, his fingers slide against my center before he plunges one into me and I bite his lip at the intrusion. His lips move to my neck as he adds another, slowly moving them in and out. As his palm presses against my sensitive area, my body heats up with the beautiful feeling. Before I know it, I am exploding with my second orgasm thanks to this beautiful man above me.
“Fuck, you are so goddamn beautiful when you come,” he groans.
Trying to catch my breath, I hear the drawer beside his bed open. He comes back and lays a foil package beside us. This is it. I’m about to have sex for the first time.
Nuzzling my neck, Camden pushes his sleep pants down and kicks them onto the floor, leaving him completely naked on top of me. “Since it’s your first time, it’s going to hurt. But, baby, I’ll do everything I can to not make it too bad. I promise.”
More than anything, I love that he sees this as my first time since my technical first time was taken from me. With both hands, I grasp his face and look into his eyes. “I trust you.”
He kisses me hard, leaving me breathless as he pulls away to grab the foil. I watch, mesmerized, as he slides it over his length. He’s big. Like I’m afraid this is going to be extremely painful kind of big. I know he will fit, our bodies are made for this kind of stuff, but damn if I don’t question it some.
He must sense my worry as I stare at him and gives me a soft smile. “You trust me, right?”
I nod. “Wholly.”
He comes back over me, settling between my thighs, and I feel his length against me and my body tenses. He kisses my neck, whispering reassuring words into my ear, and I relax some. With one hand braced holding him above me, he uses the other to guide himself into me. He goes slowly and the feeling of being stretched is scary and erotic at the same time.
Without breaking eye contact, he pushes himself in inch by inch. I wince at the pain, and he stops his movements. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, baby.”
I clutch his back and try to relax. “It’s okay. Maybe just rip it off like a Band-Aid?”
He nods and stares into my eyes as he plunges into me, making me gasp. “God, baby, you feel so good,” he groans into my ear.
He doesn’t move for a while and the burning pain fades away, becoming tolerable. The room fills with a mixture of our panting and bodies fusing together as he slowly pulls out of me and then back in a little faster. With every pump into me, I get lost in the sensation and feel my body building to release. Camden’s movements become more forceful, and I know he is close too.
Within minutes, I’m clutching to him, riding the waves of my orgasm. He comes close behind me, shouting my name as he pushes into me deep and drops his head to the pillow beside mine.
We lie there for I don’t even know how long. Camden’s body weight is slightly crushing me as we try to catch our breaths, but I welcome having him so close. I feel happy. Happier than I have ever felt. I have a man who loves me and who I have fallen hopelessly in love with, who just made love to me. What more could a girl want?
After we are able to breathe without panting, Camden kisses me on the forehead and rolls to the other side of the bed. I hear him toss something into the trash and I assume he has removed the condom.
He rolls back over and wraps his arm around my waist, bringing me against his chest, my head tucked under his chin. “Thank you, Blaire.”
I feel like I should be the one thanking him. “I’ve been so scared of this moment for years and I can’t think of how it could have been better. It was always meant to be you, Camden.” I snuggle into his chest as his arm around me tightens and I can’t help but feel safe as I admit something so vulnerable to him.
“It was perfect,” he tells me. “How do you feel?”
I look up into his eyes because I want him to see the honesty in my words. “Amazing. Happy. Loved. Cherished. A little sore, but tingly all over.”
He smiles and runs the back of his fingers down my spine. I shiver at the feeling of his touch. “I’m sorry it hurt, but it’ll get better each time. I promise.”
“Better?” I laugh. “I can’t think of how that could get any better.”
He gives me an evil smile and rolls me until I’m on my back and he’s half on me, hovering just an inch from my face. “Oh, baby, the things I can do to this beautiful body of yours.” His hand slides from my hip to my stomach and stops to grab my breast. I moan. “Just you wait. I’ll have you telling me I’m a sex god in no time with how I’m going to worship you.”
I laugh and shove him away from me. “Oh my gosh, you did not just say you’re a sex god.”
“Nope, Gray Eyes, I saidyou’regoing to be telling me I am one. Just you wait.” He gives me a knowing smile and pulls me back so my head is resting on his chest. My eyes drift closed as my body gets heavy and before sleep takes over, I faintly hear the words ‘I love you’ being said in my ear.
