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There’s a fleeting desire to cut myself with it—just to hurt him. It seems the only way I can hurt him is if I hurt myself. But the thought fizzles quickly. Self-harm doesn’t work for me anymore, not the way it used to. I learned as much that night in the hotel room.
Meeting Alexander has put me on to a more satisfying and addictive way to chase away the emotional turmoil—sexual masochism. But I can’t even let myself indulge in that until I’ve figured out how to protect my heart from him.
This hunger strike will have to do.
I’m going to starve myself until he gives in to me. If he wants to play this game, then we can. I will make him wish he never started it. I won’t stop until he’s on his knees, apologizing to me for everything he’s done.
Until hebegs–not demands–that I eat.
The thought of Alexander broken and begging is enough to motivate me. Since he acts like he cares this much, I’ll actually give him something to care about. A grim smile twists my lips.
I’ve finally found his weak spot.
TWENTY
ALEXANDER
“What’sin it for me and my family?” Zahoor Toure says, swirling the dark liquor in his lowball glass.
He’s seated across from me at the large oak table. Savin Kiselev sits across from us, his cold eyes assessing us both with calculated precision.
The air in the room is tenser than I hoped it would be for a meeting of this nature. Both of their families have been friends of the Empire Syndicate for years now. The fact they’re even a bit apprehensive is proof that Keller’s already poisoned more people than I realized.
“You know you only have to ask, Toure. Our families have been allies for almost a decade. My win will ensure that you’ll continue to have a friend in averyhigh place.” I lean in so my voice doesn’t carry. “Do you honestly think you can trust Keller?”
A moment of tension passes between us.
“He’s as slimy as they come,” Savin finally says. “You’d have better luck trusting a thief to do your accounting.”
A small chuckle escapes me. Zahoor’s eyes bounce from Savin, to me. He leans back in his chair, the wood creaking under his weight—he must be almost six-and-a-half feet.
“That’s true,” he says, rubbing his chin. “Duke will have to pay us for our troubles, though. Keller’s offer is very convincing. Even if it’s just short-term.”
I nod. “Of course. The Empire is prepared to help the Toures and Kiselevs in whichever way we agree on.”
He grunts a response. “We want weapons at cost for the next two years.”
Savin chimes in. “We want safe passage through your ports for our shipments coming in over the next year. Protection for them, too. Give us that and you have my support.”
I pause, sizing them up.
Though I’ve framed this as a negotiation, there’s no way I can refuse them—even if their requests are steep. Their support is imperative.
Zahoor is popular among the sophomores—a favor to him will win me the majority of their votes. Savin controls the juniors. After years of being the most helpful, he has finally started collecting on all the favors.
With both of them on my side, Ishouldhave the majority. I’ll only need to do my due diligence among the seniors to ensure I get most of their votes. The seniors are more fickle—it will take more than finding an influential person to sway them.
I’ll have to come out of pocket.
But it will be worth it.Anything is worth it.
I can always make more money. But I can’tbuythis opportunity. That’s the very thing that makes it so elusive, why Keller is going out of his way to make it his. It’s the one thing our blood money can never buy us—true power and influence.
I only have a couple of weeks until the election. It’s now or never.
This evening, I’ll speak to my father to ensure that Zahoor and Savin’s requests are met as quickly as possible. I can already hear his resistance, but he hardly has a choice. If I don’t win this election, he’s fucked too.
The rest of my day is jam-packed with meetings just like this—negotiations to get votes. The only break I have is right after this one. I wrap up the meeting with Zahoor and Savin quickly. Their apprehension was a ruse. They only wanted assurance that their outlandish requests would be met.
