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My heart sank. “Why not?”
“Because you have to care about someone to fall in love.” He gave me a hardened look. “And I don’t care about anyone, remember?”
Now, I was the one to say, “Bullshit.” Twisting sideways in my seat, I met his hard look with one of my own. “You care about me, Joe.”
“You’re my friend,” he conceded.
“Yeah, your friend that you care about.”
“Molloy.”
“It’s okay to care about me, Joe.”
He glared at me. “I don’t care.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Yes, youdo.”
“Listen, the only one I’ve ever been able to depend on being there is my shadow, and that’s how I like it,” he snapped, running a hand through his hair. “I don’t care about people because I can’t afford to. I don’t have the time in my life or the space inside of my head to allow myself to care about anyone other than my family. That’s me, okay? That’s who I am. I can’taffordto care, Molloy.”
“Well, that sucks because I do,” I tossed back, feeling hurt, and flustered, and a million other emotions in this moment. “I care about you, Joey, and I always have.”
It had never been my brightest idea.
Too bad I was headstrong and incessantly reckless with my heart.
Too bad I was determined to care about him regardless.
“Don’t fucking say it out loud,” Joey groaned, dropping his head in his hands. “Christ Molloy, why do you always have to go too far? Why can’t you just keep that shit to yourself,please!”
“You mean like you?” I demanded, unflinching. “You know, Joe, one of these days you’re going to have to stop lying to yourself and admit how you feel.”
“There’s nothing to admit.”
“Yes, there is, and you know it.”
“You’re wrong.”
“You’re just afraid to admit it,” I argued, holding a finger up. “Because that means you’ll have to acknowledge the fact that there’s a girl sitting right in front of you who cares about you for no other reason than that she just does! A girl who isn’t depending on you to do anything for her other than be her friend! A girl who sees just how much of an asshole you can be, but cares about you regardless, because I do, Joe. I absolutely fucking care, despite your shit-head tendencies, hell, maybe evenbecauseof them.” I threw my hands up in resignation. “Who the hell knows anymore?”
“If you could justtryto understand what I’m trying to do,” he bit out, and then exhaled a ragged breath. “If you only knew what I was trying to spare you from, you wouldn’t push for this.”
“Push you for what?” I demanded, heart thudding violently. “Your friendship?”
“Push for anything from me,” he roared back. “Fuck!”
Eyes bulging with temper, I went right ahead and pushed him.Literally.With both hands.“How’s that for a push, you big coward!”
“Don’t fucking start,” Joey warned, holding an arm up to ward me off. “Don’t even think about going there with me. It won’t end well.”
“Too late.” I pushed him again and then I did it twice more for good measure. “Come on, tough guy, at least now I’m pushing for more in the only way you seem to understand!”
“Molloy.”
I pushed him.
“I’m warning you.”
I pushed him again.
