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Mom enters my room with a yawn. “Honey, do you need help?”
“I’m the worst mother ever,” I confess through a cry. “He won’t settle, and my breasts are hurting so much.”
“It’s okay, Alexa. Your milk has come through, so we’ll grab some cold cabbage leaves from the refrigerator to help with the pain. As for this little one, we can feed him some formula to give your breasts a break.”
“Will he get sick having formula?”
“Of course not.” Mom smiles. “It’s perfectly safe for him. Right now, we need to take care of you.”
Mom carries him downstairs and returns with a bottle, plus cabbage leaves. How she manages to do all this at 2 A.M. and still be wide awake is beyond me.
I lay on the bed and place the cabbage leaves on. Almost instantly, I feel relieved enough to be able to close my eyes.
When I wake in the morning, I’m still in the same position. Only Elijah is fast asleep in his bassinet beside me. I peek inside, watching his little face sleep so peacefully.
My whole body is aching like I’ve run a marathon. I opt for a quick shower in case he wakes up. When I’m finished, I put on my feeding bra and the pads since my milk is out of control. Just getting out of the shower, they began leaking everywhere.
The outfit I choose is a pair of shorts, a tank, and sneakers, given it’s hot out. My hair has grown and annoys me, so I throw it up into a bun just so it’s off my skin.
When I’m done, Elijah begins to stir. It takes me another hour to feed, burp, and change his diaper. Then, I put him into a cute onesie, only to hear him take another dump.
“Great, buddy,” I mutter.
Once again, I remove the onesie and begin changing him, only for him to pee straight into the air and all over me. His little move causes me to gasp.
“What the hell, dude?”
With a groan, I take everything off him and place another diaper on, plus a new onesie since some pee landed on him too. Then, I change into another outfit since I was also caught in the massacre of pee.
Finally, we make our way downstairs so I can have some breakfast.
“Morning, honey,” Mom calls softly. “Why don’t you pass him to me so you can eat?”
I gladly welcome the help and dive straight into the bacon and eggs Mom cooked. Just because I’m starving, I take a bagel too and some fruit.
“Mom, how did you do this?” I question her. “And four times? I’m so exhausted, and getting downstairs was such a challenge.”
“Trust me, Alexa. I was just like you when Millie was born. Granted, your dad was amazing. I was a mess all the time.”
My eyes fall upon my plate, the heaviness weighing in my chest again.
“So, I guess having the dad around feels different?”
Mom lifts her head to meet my gaze. Just as she is about to open her mouth, there’s a knock on the back door. Mom walks over and opens it to find Beau on the other side.
I find my stare lingering on his arms again, wondering why I’m always fixating on them. Just admit they look good and call it a day. Beneath the table, I press my thighs shut to control the stir.
“There’s my main man.” He grins, taking Elijah from Mom. “Did he grow overnight?”
“Maybe. You missed the pee show this morning.”
Beau cocks his head with a smirk. “Pee show?”
“Yeah. Apparently, boys like to pee when the diaper comes off. As someone who has lived with sisters, this is very new to me.”
He laughs, then leans in and rubs his nose against Elijah. The simple thing makes my heart swell. Beau is amazing with Elijah, a natural, like he was born to be a father.
“Boys and their penises… the drama,” Beau muses.
