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Hux’s eyes widened, then he grinned. “Are you making a joke about blow jobs, little darlin?”
“Well, it’s not a funny joke if you have to explain it.” She leaned forward, pressing her face into Hux’s neck. It was easier with him and Owen. They hadn’t been in that room. Hadn’t looked at her in confusion and anger. But she had still wronged all of them.
“I’m sorry, Hux.”
“Why are you apologizing, little darlin’? We’re the ones who should have run to your defense.”
“And I was the one who kept things from you.”
“Exactly,” Judd said. “You didn’t tell us that he asked you to distract us.”
Judd loomed over her, and she felt the urge to hide behind Hux.
But this is Judd. He won’t hurt you.
However, Owen didn’t seem that impressed, and he stepped between them, shoving Judd back. “Do not speak to her like that.”
“What? She’s not completely innocent in this!”
“You do not get to use that tone on her,” Owen said. “She is delicate. Precious.”
“I have the right to ask her questions!” Judd said, pushing him back. “She’s not just yours.”
Shit. They couldn’t fight. And they definitely shouldn’t draw attention to themselves in this neighborhood.
She jumped up.
“Chloe, no!” Hux yelled.
She threw herself between them just as Judd went to shove Owen again. Because she was smaller, his hand landed on her face, making her nose sting. She cried out in pain as Owen caught her, steadying her.
“Chloe!” they all yelled. Owen picked her up and Beck and Hux crowded around her.
“I didn’t mean to. Fuck! Fuck!” Judd started pacing back and forth, his hands brushing over his head. “Fuck!”
“It’s okay. I’m fine. It’s not bleeding.”
Beck drew her hand away, inspecting her nose. “It could use some ice.”
“Let me down. I want to speak to Judd.”
All three men frowned down at her.
“Let me down, Owen,” she said firmly.
“No.”
“Owen, please. I have to try to save us all. This is my fault you’re all falling apart and I have to make it right.”
Hux cupped her face between his hands. “Not everything is your fault. It’s okay to be mad at us, to be upset. We deserve it and we’re not going anywhere.”
She took in a deep breath and nodded. “I still need to fix this.”
“And we need to fix this between us,” Beck said. “Each of us need to mend our bond with you. Will you let us?”
This was everything she wanted . . . and yet at the same time she was terrified to say yes. What if they couldn’t trust each other again? She felt guilty, yet at the same time abandoned and hurt.
But if she pushed them away now . . . she would be miserable. Just look at her these few days without them. It had felt like her heart was being torn from her chest. If they could give her another chance . . . then she had to do the same for them.
“Yes,” she whispered. “I’ve been so miserable without you guys, even when I was angry at you all, I wanted you with me. But I . . . I don’t know if I can ever go back there. To Escana.”
Beck’s gaze softened. “We’ll cross that bridge later. Okay?”
“Please, let me down, Owen.”
He put her down, and she slowly moved over to Judd. He was staring at the shack she’d grown up in. Her eyes were watering, her nose stinging, but it wasn’t as bad as they all seemed to think.
She’d been through worse.
“Judd,” she whispered.
“Don’t come any closer to me,” he said.
“Why not?” she asked. “Because you hate me?”
He swung toward her and she heard Owen growl behind her. Turning, she gave them all a hard look. They couldn’t interfere.
Beck nodded, and she knew he’d keep them back.
“I could never hate you. That’s the problem.” He let out a deep breath. “It would be easier if I could. If I could just move on and forget about you.”
“That’s what you’d rather do?” she asked, sadness filling her. “I understand.”
She turned and took a step toward the others. A firm arm wrapped around her waist, dragging her back. Then he drew her gently against him, his arms around her.
“No,” he told her. “I don’t want to move on. I don’t want to forget about you. I can’t get you out of my head. You’re all I think about. That horror on your face as you looked at me. It plays over and over in my head. But in my mind, I move to you. I take you in my arms and I tell you that you’ll be all right. Only, I didn’t do that. How can you ever forgive me? When the smoke bomb went off, I didn’t even move to get you.”
“You were doing your job.”
“I’m always doing my job,” he said bitterly. “It’s become the only focus in my life. And it shouldn’t be. You should be.”
