AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Gage doesn’t answer; he just walks away.
Strange.
We don’t continue our conversation even while him, Hayes, and I eat together. We offer Kit to eat with us, but he prefers to stay in his room. He knows Rialta left, but he doesn’t know why or when she’ll be back. Beckett hasn’t left Ri’s room, even after Hayes brought them something to eat. It’s understandable, considering all the emotions they have to process. Despite Ri being awake, all of our moods grow solemn again as we realize the loss they are feeling.
I know they can try again, but I’m not sure they’re going to want to until they can find a way out of this life. So they either lose their dream of having kids, or we lose them in our lives.
Suddenly, the door to Ri’s bedroom swings open, and Beckett steps out. His face is a contrast of emotions—happiness, sadness, guilt, shame, relief, and pain. He feels it all. But above everything, he looks absolutely exhausted.
“Lennox, Ri wants to see you.”
I stand, taking a deep breath, trying to prepare myself for how hard this is going to be. I walk down the hallway to Beckett. He eyes me, telling me to help her, to help them both. Because he can’t help her.
I squeeze his shoulder. I can’t promise anyone anything. If cheering up is needed, Hayes is a much better choice. Gage could give her information from any surveillance he’s done. I’m not sure what I can offer her that would help, but I’ll do my best.
As much as I want to ask her about how she would vote on Ri, I know today isn’t the day to burden her with that question. So it will have to wait another day. My chest grips my heart at that thought. I’m not sure I can bare it.
“Are you coming?” I ask Beckett.
He shakes his head. “No, she wants to talk to you alone.”
I nod. “Then take a shower or a nap. Do something to take care of yourself. You’ll be able to help her more once you get some rest.”
His lips thin into a frown, and then he leaves me to enter Ri’s room alone. I’m not sure if he’s going to take my advice or not.
I enter the room quietly, not sure if Ri’s going to be awake or asleep. I close the door carefully, and then I find her gaze.
She smiles at me like I’m her favorite person in the world, but that’s Ri. When you’re with her, she makes you feel like she loves you.
I plaster a nervous smile on my face as I walk toward the side of her bed and lean down to give her a gentle hug. Her warmth wraps around me, and her hand strokes my back like I’m the one in need of comforting. Our hug ends, and I ease into the chair next to her bed.
I open my mouth to ask her how she’s doing but snap it shut, instantly realizing it’s a stupid question.
“I’m okay,” she says with assurance in her voice.
I look past the shield she’s putting up.
“No, you’re not.”
Her shoulders slump, and her façade fades away. “No, I’m not fine,” her voice quakes.
I wrap my arms around her again as her tears fall onto my shoulder, wetting my shirt. She almost immediately tries to stop the tears.
“Don’t—get it all out,” I say.
She continues trying to stop until I let all of my own pain and loss out, too, through my own tears. Finally, she releases every painful emotion—I feel them all. And she feels mine, even though neither of us know any details.
Together we process. Wave after wave bursts through us. Every time one of us begins to slow, the other starts up again. I don’t think I’ve ever cried this much in my life.
“Okay, I don’t think I have any tears left to cry,” Ri croaks out between hiccups.
I hiccup too.
And we both smile—a tiny spark of genuine happiness in both of our expressions. Not enough to live off of, but enough that we can stop crying.
I grab two tissues from the end table and hand one to her. We both blow our noses, but it’s no use. The crying has made both of our noses stuffy and our faces swollen. But the crying session was worth it for the calm release we’re both feeling now.
“Can I get you anything?” I ask.
