AllFreeNovel
Share Us
His fingers traced the lines of the claws. “He must be a really good friend.”
I couldn’t tell if there was jealousy there or not, and I wasn’t sure if I found that flattering. I certainly hadn’t thought about Elliot romantically since we were nineteen, and that had been short-lived.
“Elliot’s family,” I answered. “Maybe not genetically, but in all the ways that count. He’s the brother I never had.”
Taavi settled against me, his fingers dropping from my arm. “I never had anyone like that,” he murmured. “I think my dad worried that I’d end up hurting anyone I got too close to. And mytiawas always worried about her kids, my cousins. They moved to Tucson when I was twelve.” He shrugged. “And that was pretty much it.”
“You didn’t keep in touch?”
“My dad didn’t. I never found out why.”
Taavi fell silent and shifted, turning his left shoulder into my chest and bringing his legs up on the futon. His head rested on my collarbone, and I dared to bring up one hand to softly run my fingers over his hair. He didn’t object, so I kept doing it.
By the time Ernesto de la Cruz had thrown Miguel into the pit, Taavi was asleep, his breath deep and slow with that tiny hitch between inhalation and exhalation.
I was such a dumbass.
When the movie ended and went back to the film screen, Taavi was still asleep, and I didn’t have the heart to wake him. I dared to scoot just enough that I could half-recline, Taavi still resting against my chest, to try to sleep myself.
It sort of worked. Enough that I missed sunrise, anyway.
I woke up when Taavi sat up, the movement away from my body enough to bring me out of my dazed sleep. I made a sound that was half-grunt, half-groan, which I tried to cut off when I belatedly realized it sounded like I was complaining. I wasn’t.
Don’t get me wrong, my neck was stiff as fuck and my spine needed a good crack or three, but I would not have been anywhere else for the world.
“Ha—Val,” Taavi rasped, correcting my name mid-syllable. “I’m sorry.”
“I’m not,” I said, then wondered if that was a stupid thing to say.
He looked at me, head tilted, brown eye searching my face for something.
I reached out, slowly enough that he could easily pull away from me if he wanted, then brushed a stray lock of hair back behind his ear. He closed his eyes and turned his cheek into my hand, and my heart melted into a squishy little puddle of goo behind my sternum.
I cupped his cheek, not knowing where to draw the lines anymore. Not wanting there to be any fucking lines at all. But I was the one who had started drawing them, so I only had myself to blame for the fact that they criss-crossed the air between us.
Then he turned away, staring down at the old, stained floor beneath his feet. “You always have to take care of me,” he whispered.
“Except when you take care of me,” I answered.
He looked over at me, a frown on his face.
I drew in a breath, then let it out again. “In the car, that one morning,” I said softly. “That night in the bathroom after we found Oldham’s list.” I swallowed. “When I stuck my foot in it and you told me to cut it out and grow the fuck up.”
The furrow between his eyes deepened at that.
“Taavi, I’m sorry. You were right. I’m a fucking mess, and I was too afraid to admit it because it’s easier to just keep pretending I’ve got it all together. But you always saw right through that, and it scared—no, itstillscares me. Fucking terrifies me. But…”
In for a goddamn penny, so why the fuck not?
“I’m a complete basket case, a raging asshole, and a total fuckup. But if you’re okay with that—”
I didn’t get a chance to finish the sentence because his lips were on mine, rougher than he should have been, because the split on his lower lip reopened, and I could taste blood.
Like I gave a fuck.
Taavi’s lips were pressed against mine, his good hand twisted in the neck of my stained shirt, pulling our mouths together. I reached out and held his jaw in both hands, feeling the soft skin of his cheeks against my palms.
Then he pulled back a little, and I let him go, although I kept his face between my hands. He sucked on his lower lip with a small wince.
