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“Why didn’t you come and speak?” She took her time breaking their embrace.
Jas’ eyes shot up to me. “Oh, I ain’t know you were here.”
Shit…
Not that it was done intentionally, but the last thing I needed was for Noelle to think I’d slighted her again.
“I—”Uhhhh… My eyes bounced between the two of them, still joined by one arm. “I told you Chi-Chi was coming home tonight.”
“Yeah, but you didn’t say Jas was the one dropping her off. I thought Amy was bringing her. Or Ava.”
Insulted, I quickly supplied, “Ava’s an employee. She’ll never drop my daughter anywhere.”
When Jas’ attention swept over to me, I noticed the momentary strain in his eyelids. Commanding every muscle in my body, I remained stoic. I didn’t know what arrangements he and Ava had, but I’d had my boundaries set as far as she was concerned.
“Nah,” he answered Noelle. “We just got back into town. It was time to get the little lady back to her moms. How you been, shortie?”
A sunburst of joy lit Noelle’s face even more. “I’m good. We found out coach Smith isn’t gay. Wanna know how?”
“How?”
“Because she kept staring at you at the game. She even asked me if you had a girlfriend. I died!” Noelle curled over in laughter.
Jas went to Noelle’s basketball game? I, unfortunately, hadn’t been able to attend this season because of work.
But he did?
And had my sister just expressed being okay with other women seeing the father of my child as a love or lust interest—and in my face?
“Say less, shortie,” Jas snorted rather shyly, making me wonder if he was just as put off about it as me. “But everything good, though? Sophomore year still treating you right?”
Noelle nodded, plucking rolled salami from the charcuterie board. “I’m good. The spring dance is coming up. I need to start getting ready for that.” Her brows met. “You think Ava can help me out again? She was so legit for the Winter Wonderland Ball. Please say she can help me again!” She clutched his arm, and my eyes blew the hell up.
In that instant, I knew I should have spoken up. In the past, I would have been all over Noelle’s ass for not just having Jas’ assistant do something I could have for her, but also for me not even knowing she had a need. Why wouldn’t she tell me? I could have also asked her, but with her temperament lately, I didn’t know how she’d react and I truly didn’t want to break my sister’s spirit. Life had already done that; she was still grieving the loss of her mother. Instead, I applied a poker face and fought to control my emotions.
“I think I’ve got Ava wrapped up in enough shit. Matter of fact…” He looked my way. “…don’t forget to reply to that email.” Shaking his head, Jas admitted, “I ‘on’t know about Paris, but we can kick it about other spots.”
When he made it to the doorway of the kitchen, Ines appeared. Though surprised to see her, Jas greeted her with a kiss on the cheek, usual for those two. It was one of the few things that guaranteed a grin from her. I stood, leaning against the island, stuck. So many emotions charging my belly like shooting missiles. My attention lifted to Noelle, who refused to look at me. She nibbled on cheese from the board and appeared lost in her phone.
“No—” I cleared my throat. “Noelle, why didn’t you ask me to help you with the dress for the Winter Wonderland Ball? I attendedJohn Yancey Christian Academymy entire primary and secondary educational experience. I could have taken you to the seamstress and boutique who the board has approved.” She wouldn’t look at me, spurring my anger. “Noelle, I would rather you not use Ava as a resource. I don’t…” I swallowed hard taking a deep breath. “I’m here if you need anything, you know that.”
Finally, her eyes rolled up to me. Softly, Noelle shook her head. “No, you ain’t. You ain’t here for nobody. Not me, not Dad, not Chi-Chi, not Jas, not your old friends.”
With a clenched jaw, I informed her, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m here for my family andfrien—”
“You got the celebrities, your new dance troupe. You ain’t got me.” After a rolling of her eyes, she ambled out of the kitchen.
My eyes began to sting and throat closed up, preventing upending emotions from exploding. Not knowing what else to do, I whipped my frame from the island and shot into the hallway to slip on boots and my coat. I let myself out on the balcony, fighting to adjust to the freezing winds of the night. It took seconds for my vision to blur against the nightlights of my view, eyes pooling with tears and throat burning until I opened my mouth, surrendering to the blow to my heart. In no time, I was silently bawling.
“Why, Shi-Shi?” Ines’ gruff abruptly sounded. Then her hand was on my shoulder.
“Because,” I wailed. “…it’s either this or me cursing her ass out. I…don’t want to do that. She’s grieving.”
“She’s calling out. That’s all that’s about.”
“She’s mean. Horrible!” I lifted my head from my palms. “I’m a working mom. No, I don’t have the time to hang out with her like I used to, but don’t forget the times I did. So, now it’s okay to be rude and bitchy?”
“She’s a young girl, fighting for her big sister’s attention is all. Don’t let her get you all worked up like this. You’re just going to have to figure it out.”
