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“I want you back, Travis,” she blurts out, and I suck in a breath. Suddenly, I can’t hear what’s being said. All I can hear is the way my heart is pounding in my ears. My mind drifts back in time, back when he and I were lying in bed that first night. I remember him telling me about his marriage, how he’d loved her and held out hope she’d return. How he didn’t even think of filing for divorce because he hoped she’d return.
Now she’s back, and she wants him. I wish I felt confident enough to know that I didn’t need to worry, but the truth is, I don’t. We haven’t even let anyone know about our relationship. We haven’t talked about getting serious or where this could lead. Maybe there’s a bigger reason why he wanted to keep things private. Maybe it didn’t have anything to do with wanting to be sure about us. Maybe it had everything to do with holding out hope that she would return.
I feel the sting of tears in my eyes. My heart is still racing, nearly pounding from my chest as I push myself away from the wall. I rush through the bar and out the door, knowing that I’m not going to be able to hold myself together long enough to bartend. I climb behind the wheel of my car and drive myself home, needing to take some time for myself.
“I thought you had to work?” Mom says when I walk in.
“Change in schedule,” I mumble, walking through the house to my bedroom.
She lets me go, and the second I’m alone, I toss down my things and fling myself onto the bed. I’m lost in thoughts, fears, and emotions. Part of me wants to believe that everything Travis said was true and heartfelt, that he wasn’t hiding us for any ulterior motive. But that nagging voice inside of me won’t let me believe it for long. Instead, that voice focuses on everything that could go wrong and everything I could lose.
This is exactly why I wanted to sit him down and have that talk, but every time I planned to do it, I chickened out, fearing the end. It looks like the end is sooner than I thought. If we’d had that talk, I wouldn’t feel like this right now. I’d know exactly where I stand. But here I am, stuck in limbo, just waiting.
I know I shouldn’t have walked out of the bar. I was scheduled to work a shift and now I’ve left John hanging. I feel guilty for that, but I knew there was no way I could stand behind the bar with a smile on my face while everything slipped from my grasp. My phone rings but it’s across the room and right now, I can’t move to answer it. I’m sure it’s John asking if I’m coming back in. It’s not like my phone has been ringing off the hook lately.
I ran from a hard life with plans of starting something better. I thought that was what I was doing. As it turns out, I was just making mistake after mistake. And now, I’m not sure how to fix it.
14
TRAVIS
Ilisten as Jessica lays it all out. I try to remain calm. I don’t know why she thinks she can just walk in and out of my life as she sees fit. If she had come back last year, I probably would’ve taken her back. Hell, if she would have come back three months ago, I probably would have taken her back. But today, there’s nothing I want more than for her to sign the divorce papers and get out of my life once and for all.
I’ve been meaning to talk to Riley about the future I want for us, I’ve just been too much of a chicken. I was scared she’d turn me down. Her divorce hasn’t even gone through yet. How could I expect her to tie her life to mine so soon? I wanted to be patient and let us adjust to this new life we were creating.
“Well, what do you think?” Jessica asks, stealing me from my thoughts.
I shake my head and let out a breath. “I’m glad you’re back.” I open my drawer and pull out the papers I had drawn up. “I’ve wanted to get these to you for a long time. Now that you’re back, we can get started on the divorce.”
Her brows pull together as she pushes her hair behind her ear. “You… you don’t want me back?”
I straighten my back. “Honestly, if you would’ve come back a year ago, I would’ve taken you back at the drop of a hat. But now…” I shake my head. “I’ve moved on. I don’t want to start over. I want a new start.”
“A new start, but not with me?”
“Correct.” I nod. “I’m sorry if I’m coming off like an ass; it’s not intentional. I just want to make it clear that we’re done and there’s no getting back together. Not after all you’ve put me through. I’m sorry things ended the way they did. Maybe if you’d have come to me back then, we could’ve figured it out. But you didn’t. You did what you did. And now, it’s time for me to do what I think is best. Take the papers with you. Have your lawyer look over them if you want, but I need to get back to work.” I stand, hoping she understands that this meeting is done.
She sits there, looking up at me for a moment, almost like she doesn’t believe how this is turning out. After a couple of seconds of us looking at one another, it sets in. She steels her expression and stands, moving out of my office and right out the front door without so much of a goodbye.
I walk behind the bar. “What are you still doing here?” I ask John. “Where’s Riley?”
He shrugs as he dries his hands. “She came in, went to the office, and ran back out. Didn’t say a word.”
I feel my brows lift. “She came to my office?”
He nods.
Shit. That means she heard Jessica and me. Who knows what she’s thinking right now? “Can you handle the bar for a little while longer?”
He checks his watch. “I guess, but if you’re not back in an hour, I’m going to have to close. I have something going on tonight that I can’t be late for.”
I nod. “Alright. I’ll be back,” I tell him, rushing out the door.
I hop behind the wheel of my truck and drive to her parents’ house. Her car is in the driveway, so I park and make my way toward the door. I knock, not having any idea what I’m going to say to her parents if they open the door.
The door opens and Riley is on the other side. Her eyes are puffy and bloodshot.
I let out a sigh of relief that I’ve found her, and that she’s willing to see me. “Can we talk?”
