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One thought led to the next, making me sick to my stomach. I never considered them still being together and having a family. I wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt. But the longer I stood there, the further my resentment and anger grew.
It wasn’t until the woman’s gaze found mine through the yard that I truly wanted to scream, “Why didn’t you want me?”
She didn’t move.
She didn’t speak.
She didn’t show me anything.
Nothing of what I’d hoped I’d see.
Seconds, minutes, hours could have flown by, and not once did I look away, openly showing her my agony and dismay. She knew who I was, that much I could see. Except, she didn’t give a flying fuck. She was the woman who’d brought me into this world, and at that moment, it was obvious that it was all she’d ever be. I wasn’t her son. I was just an accident and mistake she gotten rid of. She must have read my mind, because she simply turned and left. Everyone followed her into their home, and I continued to stand there and consider my options. I could knock on their door, make a big, ugly scene. Confront them, ask them everything, but in the end it wouldn’t matter.
It wouldn’t change one damn thing.
Instead of getting answers, I locked up my emotions like they never existed to begin with. Getting in my car, I left. Wanting to get lost and not be found. My mind was a jumbled mess of what the fucks. My head was pounding so hard I could barely see straight. It felt like a hammer was beating in my skull.
I drove around aimlessly, drinking away my sorrows before I snapped out of whatever stupor I was in. The last thing I needed was to get a DUI. By the time I’d made it back to my house, it was well into the night. Past midnight. The whiskey was long gone, and all I had left was my misery.
Christian wasn’t home, which meant he was at his girlfriend’s, or should I say fiancée now. Seeing as he’d asked her to marry him a couple months ago, spending more time at her place ever since. I was glad he’d found someone to spend the rest of his life with. That future wasn’t in the cards for me, not when I couldn’t be with the one I wanted the most.
“Get your shit together,” I uttered to myself, wanting to wash away the day and the booze. I walked into my bathroom to take a quick shower, and after I pulled my shirt off, I remembered I’d left my toiletries in Christian’s bathroom. The drain in my shower was clogged, and I’d forgot to pick up Drano to fix it.
Grabbing a beer out of the fridge first, I made my way into his bedroom and stopped dead in my tracks when I saw her.
Sleeping.
Peaceful.
Fucking beautiful.
Christian gave her a key to our place in case we lost ours, and I was beyond grateful for it. Especially then. Her head was on a pillow, wrapped in a throw blanket she’d bought me for my twenty-fourth birthday last month. She must have gone into my bedroom and grabbed it before she’d fallen asleep in her brother’s bed.
Over the last year, since she’d turned seventeen, I’d kept her at arm’s length. Pushing her away was the only way I knew how to live. She wasn’t mine and never would be, yet I couldn’t stop myself from picking her up and carrying her into my bed with me. Softly, I laid her on my pillow, watching her for a minute.
Fuck, she was gorgeous.
There was no resisting the urge to feel her beneath my body. Careful not to wake her, I laid on top of her and caged her in with my arms around her face. She fit seamlessly against my chest.
“Kid,” I whispered, faintly rubbing my lips on her mouth.
“Mmm…” she groaned, stirring awake.
“Wake up, Sleeping Beauty.”
Her eyes fluttered, but sleep won out.
“Autumn, if you wake up, I’ll give you anything you want.”
“Mmm-hmm,” she hummed as I kissed my way down her neck.
Once I reached the top of her breasts, I lightly bit her hard nipple through her dress. Her breathing hitched, and her eyes snapped open, big and wide. Coming face-to-face with the last person she expected to see hovering above her.
The world seemed to stop spinning, stop moving, and time just sort of stood still for us. In the last year there were times I couldn’t help myself and gave into the temptation that was her mouth.
We’d kissed.
Made out.
