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“I take it the date went well?” He laughed lightly, teasing me with a smirk.
“Beyond well. I… I had no idea it could… and then he… and we… and there was…” I babbled my way incoherently as every sentence rolled into the next, unvoiced and simply playing through in my mind in cinematic flashes.
“Yeah, I’d say it went well. Come join me in the living room and tell me all about it.” I followed him, both of us sitting on the couch, me pulling a pillow into my chest as I resisted the impulse to flutter my feet against the couch cushion in pure teenage-like bliss.
“It went so well. I really had no idea how little I knew about him. But we talked and got to know one another. I can’t remember the last time I took the time to do that, outside of kink. Other than Danielle, that is.” I explained honestly.
“You look happy,” he said, smiling at me.
“I think I actually am. I shouldn’t have waited so long to start dealing with the trauma from back then.”
“Sadie, trauma doesn’t have a timeline, let alone a deadline. We deal with it in our own time, and in our own ways. It’s like grief. It’s not linear. It is something you’ll continue to deal with for the rest of your life, in waves, in bursts, and however else it comes. I’m just glad to see you start to face it. You deserve to be happy.”
“Are you sure you’re an I.T. guru, Jamie Day? I’m half convinced you go into that office and do therapy sessions and I just don’t know about it.
“I do what I do.” He laid back against the couch, arms behind his head, with a satisfied grin and a wink.
“Enough about me and my night. How was yours? Did you see Valen again?” I asked, genuinely interested in this new person who had my husband grinning and excited.
“I did. We had drinks before they had to jet off to a work dinner. I don’t know, Sadie. They are different. It’s good. It’s easy with them.”
“Tell me about them. How did you meet? What do you two connect with?” He smiled brilliantly, sitting up and turning to face me with a renewed excitement that I fed off of.
“We met through a mutual friend; a rarity these days. They are so different from anyone I’ve dated before. So confident in exactly who they are, without reservation. It took me years to learn to be okay with who I am, and even now I struggle to be open as an asexual man. And then here’s Valen, this strong, independent, fierce, non-binary, asexual person, who is so unapologetically themselves. I don’t know. It kind of takes my breath away sometimes.” That smile lit up his entire face, his eyes glowing. New relationship energy was a thing of beauty, and we were both basking in its light.
“I think it goes without saying that you’ll be continuing this relationship.”
“I will. I haven’t felt this way since Aaron, and I think I’m ready for this relationship.”
“I’m really happy for you, Jamie. Beyond happy.”
“I’m happy for you, too, Sadie. Can we go to bed now? I’m in the mood to cuddle with my wife.”
I nodded, following him up the stairs to our bedroom, where we each readied ourselves for bed. I laid my head in his lap, nearly purring as he stroked and played with my hair while we listened absentmindedly to repeat episodes of Friends on the television.
For the first time in a long, long time, I felt truly happy and excited to see what the future held.
CHAPTER18
“I just wishyou had told me, Sadie.” Pamela’s voice was laced with both sadness and regret.
“I didn’t talk to anyone about it other than Jamie, and even that was only the one time. I vowed to never speak of it again.” I explained, sipping on my morning coffee.
“I understand that, and I respect it. Truly I do. I just wish I could have been there for you. I wish I could have helped you process it years ago. But I’m proud of you for doing so now. You’ve come a long way, Sadie. Proud doesn’t even do the feeling justice.” I smiled, nearly glowing under my mentor’s praise.
“As Jamie says, we process trauma in our own time. But I’m proud of myself, too.”
“So tell me more about this Thatcher person. He sounds like a good submissive. And moreover, good for you.”
“He is. He’s incredibly well trained, and well-spoken, too. He’s not afraid to stand up for himself. You know what we say about a strong submissive who can speak their mind.”
“There is nothing hotter!” Pamela nearly cackled in agreement.
“Exactly. And believe me, Thatcher ishot.” I giggled like a schoolgirl in response. We continued chatting happily for a few more minutes before the conversation drew to a close.
“Okay, well, I think I’m going to head out to get the mail, and then I might actually go on a walk. It’s gorgeous outside this morning.” I sighed, looking out of the kitchen window where the sun was already shining beautifully.
“That’s because you live in Pleasantville, and nothing bad ever happens in Pleasantville. The sun is always shining. It never rains. Ugh. Makes me sick. Give me good smog and rain any day, with people who scream and cuss at you. God, I love New York. Love you, girl.”
