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Is it crazy that I’m writing to a dead man?
I can’t believe your mother filed the papers to declare you dead—just when we found you. Can you see the irony in that?
My gut says she did it after she came to my parents’ house to yell at me. She blamed me for all her problems and her misery. According to her, if it hadn’t been for me, her family wouldn’t be broken and lost. She doesn’t want to have any connections with the Deckers.
She banned the Decker family from any St. James functions—or family members. Is that even possible?
Though we respect her feelings, your brothers and sister are welcome—more so when Teddy is about to become one of us again. Yep. Seth and Teddy are getting together and this time it’s not a prank from Archer St. James.
While all this is happening in Seattle, I’m in Santa Barbara tending one of my parents’ bars while trying to figure out my future. I’ll probably leave the practice next year. There’s no way I can continue to work with Derek. This journey isn’t just about not loving you anymore, but also forgetting about him.
He and I… we could’ve been everything if I hadn’t been pining for you.
There was a moment in the safe house when I realized he’s in love with you and I thought… the three of us could be happy.
That’s an impossible dream though.
Derek is an amazing man, and he’s in love with Finnegan—and here’s a secret: Finnegan is in love with him. It doesn’t take a genius to notice how much they mean to each other. I hope that Derek can become a part of Finn’s marriage—or Wren allows them to be together. It’d be heartbreaking to know that D can’t find the place where he fits.
But I shouldn’t worry about him now. I have to stop focusing on others and look after myself first.
Sending all my love to wherever it is that Finnegan Gil dumped you.
Love always,
Piper
ChapterFifty-Four
Arch,
I opened two of the last three letters.
The final goodbye was silly… This is it, Ladybug, I’m gone, but I’ll love you forever.
It wasn’t long, but you made me cry so much.
It’s silly, I know, but I did fall apart. This will be the last time I cry for a few hours because of our loss. This is the last letter, the last goodbye, the last time we think about each other.
It was the end of our story.
The end of you and me.
The other letter had your final present. It left me thinking about my future.
I can’t believe you didn’t think I would move on after all these years—deep down, you knew it would be impossible, didn’t you?
I did fall in love with a second person. Maybe I’ll find the third soon and fall in love, or perhaps I won’t.
Perhaps, I’ll fall in love with our child if I decide to withdraw from the bank where you left some of your boys for me to start our family.
And so, I’ve decided to rip all the years of pain from my heart and return to your family everything you gifted me. I’ll keep the love you gave me and the hope that I can start a new dream and a new life without you.
Farewell, my love,
Your ladybug
ChapterFifty-Five
