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I hadn’t, that was the answer. This was all so new to me. My mother’s words were still playing in my ear. She was thinking about babies, and I let myself for just a moment. It would do exactly what I didn’t want, trap me at home. I knew I couldn’t have both. At the end of the day though, was it the job or Derrick that I wanted? I had the latter, did I need the former? These were all questions that were so foreign to me, that it was hard to even have the thoughts.
“How long have you been up?”
I jerked because I was lost in thought and Derrick was now up, sitting more erect and he had the sweetest grin on his face. When Derrick was given a steady stream of sex, he was one of the most jovial people that I’d ever known. His moods were gone, as were those short words that came with it.
The phone rang before I could answer him, and I groaned. There was only one person that would call this early, and I knew who it was. I didn’t want to talk to them, and Derrick grinned and went to get my phone. He answered and I threatened to bodily hurt him if he said I was here.
“Yes, Augustine isn’t here right now. She just popped into the shower. Do you want me to have her call you back?”
Derrick waited for a few minutes while my mother said whatever and then he asked her how she was. Another dirty look was sent his way and before long, they were in a full-blown conversation, and I didn’t want to stay quiet while they talked. I already didn’t like how much my mom flirted with Derrick. She was shameless.
I decided to hurry the conversation along. I got up and accidently let the sheet drop. I wasn’t wearing anything to bed. I hadn’t meant to be so naughty, but Derrick had a way of making sleep come in a hurry and I hadn’t had time to change it.
His eyes got wide, and I smiled at him. I leaned in and whispered in his other ear that I was going to go take a shower. I kissed his cheek and swatted the hand away that was moving toward my chest of its own accord.
By the time I got to the bathroom door, he was off the phone, and I was happy for the win. I felt his hands on me, pulling me back toward him, his mouth on my neck. It didn’t take long to change the trajectory of the morning. I’d meant to say something about how we needed to get back. We were just messing around, and I didn’t want him to mess up his business. He wasn’t doing what he should and that was detrimental to all he’d worked for. Now though, I didn’t care about any of it. I just wanted his touches and kisses. They would sustain us both.
* * *
I knewwe had to leave, but when it came time to check out, I still wasn’t ready. We had stayed another day and night, still didn’t leave the hotel. His phone was ringing off the hook, so he just turned it off, and I worried that he was going to regret it. I didn’t realize how much until later.
We were still on a cloud on the way home. It was perfect, everything, the trip, us, Derrick, our marriage. I was on top of the world and for once, I wasn’t afraid of falling back down because I couldn’t imagine anything else happening. Mom was right, being married and finally doing what she’d pushed me to do, made me feel fulfilled in a way that I never thought possible. I hoped for the next step, children and growing our family. I hated that she was right, I would never admit it, but I knew deep down she was.
I didn’t stop smiling the whole way home. I was sure that this day was going to be the best on record. It was. We went home, made love the rest of the afternoon and ate lunch when it was dark outside. I wanted to bring up work and him turning his phone back on, but Derrick disagreed. “No, just one more night. We can deal with it all in the morning.”
I might have argued with him and pushed the conversation if he hadn’t kissed me in the way that he did. Then, I was no longer able to say much of anything. I didn’t care what we did later, as long as right now he gave me what it was that I wanted.
39
Derrick
When I finally turned my phone on, I immediately wanted to turn it right back off. I had so many messages, and the people who were messaging me were probably more alarming than the sheer number of messages that I was getting. Whatever was going on was likely not going to be good.
We were in a rented car on the way home from dinner when the phone started going crazy. Augustine could hear the dinging of all the messages, and she gave me a questioning look. I just kind of shrugged my shoulders like it wasn't a big deal. It was, almost all of the board members had tried to contact me in the last five or six days.
That's how long we had been at the conference, well most of it we spent hiding in the hotel. Even as it seemed like the sky was falling, I couldn't help but smile and look over at Augustine. She looked concerned, wanted to see who the messages were from, but I told her not to worry about it. I should be worried. This was my company, and I’d spent a lot of time making it what it was. I should have cared more.
I got a call on my phone right before we pulled up at home, and I took the call after Augustine suggested that I should. Actually, she told me that I better take it or she was going to think that she was back on call again as my assistant. I didn't want to get professional just yet. We could do that tomorrow when we went to the office. Today I wanted to continue on in the same vein that we had for the last few days. I wasn't ready to get back to reality just yet. I considered our lapse in judgment to be an impromptu honeymoon. We didn't get one after all and I thought we deserved one.
“Hello?” I asked, smiling at Augustine as she started to give me that sultry look that I knew exactly where it would end. I loved when she looked at me like that and it took me a moment to realize what was being said on the other side of the phone.
“Derrick, you need to get in here this morning. The board has pushed a meeting. They are going to do a vote of no confidence and try voting you out.”
I heard the words, but they weren't really sticking. “They want me out?” That didn't even make sense. I owned the company. How can they get me out? “On what grounds?”
Jimmy was a very loyal employee, and I trusted him to have good information. I just couldn't believe what he was saying. It didn't make sense. My brain did not want to focus. How could this be real? I needed more words. I told him, not really sure what else to say. I needed more than the fact that they were setting up a meeting to get rid of me. Why? What had I done? I asked him as much and as soon as I heard his answer, I knew that this was something that I had brought on myself. That wasn’t what I wanted to hear, but it was the truth.
“You haven't been here in almost a week. Nobody has been able to get ahold of you, Derrick. They thought you were dead. Then, there was an anonymous tip that you married your assistant. Nobody believed it because you know, you’re you, until they found a record of it.”
The car stopped and I could not move. I just stared off at the back of the seat, while completely tuning out Augustine altogether. What did that mean? I should have known that my rash decisions were going to cause problems. I never thought I would lose my company over it. Not like this.
I hadn't been acting the same since we got married, I would be the first to admit that, but to lose something that I had built and it took me years to build. I never would have thought that in a million years. Now I didn't know what to say, what to do. Fuck!
“Derrick, are you getting out? Do we need to go somewhere else?”
I saw the look of concern on her face, and I knew without a doubt that I didn't want her involved in whatever this was just yet. I didn't say anything until she got out of the vehicle, and then I told her I loved her and that I would see her in a little bit. The driver didn't have a problem taking me somewhere else, so I shut the door and waved. Augustine was confused, probably a little pissed off at me, but I felt better about the situation because now I could handle it like it needed to be handled. Bringing Augustine with me certainly wasn't going to help anything.
I ran from Augustine in the moment because I knew that she would not hide her reaction. She didn't and she was pissed off at me. I didn't blame her. I could have handled this better obviously. At the end of the day, I felt like it happened the way it was supposed to. I called Jimmy back and braced myself for the rest of the news he had for me. As it came in, it really felt like none of it was going to end well.
