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Finally, unable to help it, the tears break loose from my throat.
Chapter37
Gareth
Ilean over the bar at the Oak Club. Ford’s on my left, Carmine’s on my right. The wives are out together having dinner, while the kids are with a couple of expensive nannies.
Babies, babysitters. That’s a life I’ll never have. I grimace, thinking about Fiona sitting on some terrace, sunlight in her hair, belly swollen with my baby. That’ll never be my future. It’s a strange, painful realization, but maybe one day I’ll be at peace.
I made the right choice, getting her this interview.
She made the right choice accepting it.
So why does it all feel so fucking wrong?
“I can’t believe you’re leaving,” Ford says, sounding depressed. “Gareth, bro, I’ve really liked having you here.”
“Don’t be dramatic,” Carmine says, grinning at him. “He’s not dying. He’s just moving to Boston.”
Ford groans. “I almost wish he were dying instead.”
I give him a look. “That’s insane.”
“Boston’s such a shitty city.” Ford shakes his head. “I wish you were moving anywhere else. But fucking Boston? I’ll have to come visit you there and… like… go to an Irish pub.” He shudders as if it’s a fate worse than death.
“This coming from the guy that loves cliché Texas roadhouse bars,” Carmine says, rolling his eyes. “Relax, Ford. Gareth is lucky he’s getting out to the East Coast. It’ll toughen him up. He’ll get to experience winter for real.”
“Winter,” I say with a sigh. “I forgot about fuckingwinter. Remember slipping and sliding down the sidewalks at Blackwoods?”
“Snow. Slush. Sleet. Cold so cold your dick falls off.” Carmine nods slowly. “That’s what makes a man aman.”
“I hate snow,” Ford says with a grim look. “I don’t miss snow at all.”
“It’ll be fine, all right?” I throw back my drink. “I’ll settle in. Visit here as much as I can. I doubt Crowley expects me to live there all year round. I’ll take weekends in Dallas. Besides, Fiona will still be here too.”
Carmine’s eyebrows raise. “She’s not coming with you?”
“I don’t think so,” I admit and tell them about the whole Appalachian Peaks fiasco.
Ford whistles. “Is she excited? Sounds like it’s a huge deal.”
“I can’t tell,” I admit. “She seems upset.”
“She wanted to move with you,” Carmine says, leaning closer to me. “Have you been sleeping with her?”
My eyebrows raise. “What? I mean, what does that—”
“God damn it, Gareth,” Carmine says, leaning his forehead into his hand. “You’re sleeping with her.”
“Are you guys into each other?” Ford asks.
“You better not say yes.” Carmine glares at me.
“Bro, it’s fine,” Ford says, grinning huge. “You’re fucking her. Youlikeher.”
“I mean, I don’t—” I start, but Carmine cuts me off.
“You’re going to break her heartandget her killed,” Carmine says with an exaggerated sigh.
