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The sun was shining as we walked toward the front entrance of the hospital and there was a slight spring breeze that ruffled my hair, and I lifted a hand to push a loose lock behind my ear.
“More than anything, I want us to work out,” I said, knowing I’d have insecurities that I’d have to deal with on my own, but I knew it would take time and the new relationship was still fragile. “I love you, but I’m not ready to explain it to everyone yet. Is that okay?”
He nodded and dropped his hand from my back. “It’s okay, I understand. Just as long as Alan is left in no doubt of where things stand between us.”
Jealousy was something we’d both have to deal with, but I couldn’t stop the little rush of pleasure at the possessive tone in his voice. Trust went both ways and I understood that it was only fair that Dylan would feel some of the insecurity I felt considering we’d both had long-term partners that weren’t over for very long. “Of course,” I agreed. “As long as you block Christy from your phone.” I winked at him.
The dimple in Dylan’s cheek appeared when he smirked. “Already done, you goof.”
I couldn’t stop smiling as we made our way to the blood cancer ward. Dylan was inspecting all the artwork and uplifting messages that lined the walls of the hospital and I saw him taking note of the patients with nurses taking them on wheelchair rides, the two new patients and their families that entered in front of us. The children, most of them unaware of how dire their diseases were, looked at the environment with wide eyes, while worry and strain filled the faces of their parents.
I couldn’t help myself as they waited at the admissions desk for their turns and walked up to them. Dylan followed.
“Hello, I just wanted to say that this is the absolute best place in the world to come with your kids. The doctors and nurses are so caring and will take care of your entire families. I don’t mean to intrude, but I’m a survivor. I had leukemia as a small child and now I’m in medical school so I can do more to help. I’m not sure yet, but I’ll either work in research or oncology. I’m not decided yet. This place is full of hope.”
“Thank you,” said a big burly man holding a sleeping two-year-old boy. “Thank you,” he said again. His wife’s eyes filled with tears, and she reached out to squeeze my forearm just before the admissions clerk called a name. “Oliver Masters?”
“Oh, that’s us. Thank you, again.”
“Take care. I’ll say a prayer for Oliver.” I made a mental note of his name so I would be able to visit him and his family on another day.
Another young woman met my eyes. “Yes, thank you for your kind words. It’s been such a roller coaster ride.” This woman was younger and frail and holding the hand of girl around the age of nine or ten who’s head was bandaged. “I wish we would have come here right after our diagnosis.”
“You’re in the right place,” I reassured her. Dylan was a couple of steps back, but I could feel his eyes on me. “The men and women in this building are very dedicated. Have faith it will be okay.”
The woman nodded wearily.
“You had cancer?” the little girl asked looking up at me. “Cuz I have a brain tumor and my doctor could only get part of it out.” She looked terrified. Her mother’s face crumpled, and she struggled to control her emotions so her daughter wouldn’t see. I tried to get her the child’s focus on me.
I went down on one knee, lowering to her level and took her hand in mine. “What’s your name?”
“Miranda, but everyone calls me Randi.”
“Well, Randi, I did have cancer, and I had wonderful doctors who helped me get well but the doctors at St. Jude are even better and they have special treatments that other places might not have! You just concentrate on doing everything they tell you and meeting new friends, and getting your nutrition, okay?” I said reassuringly and Randi nodded. “You’ll meet a lot of kids and adults who will adore you and having fun is as much a part of your job as anything else, okay? Do you think you can do that for me?”
Randi nodded. “Will I see you again?”
“Sure!” I smiled brightly. “My name is Remi and if it’s okay, I’m going to come up and check in on you every couple of days. Is your mom able to stay here with you?” The little girl nodded. “Is it okay if I give you a hug?” I asked her.
Her slim little arms reached out and I gathered her close. “You’re going to be better than ever!”
Her mother was wiping away a tear when I stood up and hugged her as well. “I volunteer here and I’m around a lot, so I’ll stop in and see how you’re both doing.”
“Oh, my gosh! Thank you, Remi. I’m Maggie!”
It felt incredible just to give a small amount of hope to these families struggling with life and death diseases. “Concentrate on your daughter, and on healing… not the cancer.”
“Miranda Evers?” The little girl’s name was called from the admissions desk.
“You have to go get settled, now,” I winked at her. “It’s your job to feel better, got it?”
Randi smiled brightly for the first time since we’d met. “Got it!” she said enthusiastically. “Will you come see me soon?”
“Of course! Don’t think you can get rid of me that easily!”
When I turned back toward Dylan, he was staring at me with a sort of wonder in his expression.
“What is it?” I asked. The giddiness of having his obvious approval was intoxicating.
