Page 62 of Following His Commands

I third that. Your standards are so high Jesus wouldn’t even meet them.

Daisy:

I don’t think it’s too much to ask for my list to be met.

I roll my eyes. Daisy has the most ridiculous list of what her ideal man should be like. It’s unachievable if you ask me. And if she ever did find that unicorn, I’d be certain she made a deal with the devil himself to conjure him up.

Claire:

Also not sick. Have you done a preggers test? You’ve been screwing like rabbits for months.

I reread her words. My hands shake, and the phone drops to the table. I’m not pregnant. I cannot be pregnant. I know we haven’t been careful, but I took Plan B. Twice. And I’ve been popping my daily pills for almost two weeks now. I am not pregnant.

My phone rings out. It’s a video call to the group from Eloise. I press the green button to answer her.

“Okay, do not freak out. I know you’re going worst-case scenario on me right now. It’s going to be fine. Just go do a test and put us all out of the misery of wondering if we’re going to get a niece named Eloise in the next eight months or not,” she says.

“I’m not pregnant,” I whisper. Too afraid to say the words out loud.

“Okay, prove it. Meet you at your place in thirty. I’ll bring the test,” Claire says.

“I’ll be there! I’ll bring the wine that you can drink after the test comes back negative. Which it will,” Daisy adds.

“Deal. See you in thirty.” I hang up and start gathering my things. I have to get out of here without Alistair following me. I don’t need to stress him out over this before I know anything for certain. There’s no point of us both having a mental breakdown.

I open my door and peer out into the main office area. I don’t see any of the partners, so I walk over to the elevators and hit the button. Somehow, I manage to get out without being seen. I pull up my phone and send Alistair a text message.

Me:

Sorry. I left early. I have an errand I have to run.

His reply comes immediately.

Alistair:

Everything okay?

Me:

Yep, peachy. I’ll call you later.

I see the little dots appear and disappear before they pop up again.

Alistair:

Okay.

That’s it?Okay?I expected him to try to track me down. He must be busy. I tuck my phone away and jump in a taxi that’s idling out front of the building. I give the driver my address and rest my head against the seat, silently sending up prayers.

I can’t be pregnant. I’m too young. I can’t even imagine how Alistair would feel about that. He has no intention of making a lifelong commitment, and nothing is more lifelong than a child. He’s going to hate me… I mean, I should have gotten on birth control sooner. I should have insisted he wrap it before putting that weapon of his anywhere near me.

My stomach continues to twist. I don’t think I want that kind of commitment yet either. I want to be married. I want all those traditional milestones you’re meant to make before you have a child.

I can’t be pregnant. I just have the flu. That’s why I feel so rundown. I’m going to hit those girls for putting these thoughts into my head.

The cabbie pulls up outside my apartment. I tap my card to pay him and jump out. Maybe I can run away, someplace no one will find me, and I can hide. If people can’t find me, I can pretend this isn’t happening right now.

“Don’t even think about running away. If you do, I’m coming with,” Daisy says, walking up and stopping next to me.

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