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The sky was threatening to rain as I ran along the Miami Beach Boardwalk—the path I took every time I went on a run. But this morning, I’d gone even earlier than normal, trying to beat the crowd that usually jogged before work, the same time I typically went out, but today, I was hoping to get some quietness and alone time.
Hoping that, by watching the sunrise, I could make sense of the conversation that had taken place yesterday before I kicked Bale out of my apartment.
Hoping that, by exercising my body, I could clear my head.
Because … he was gone.
Forever.
And there was no turning back.
I had no way to reach him.
What had been done couldn’t be undone.
Which meant that even though I was sure of my decision, even though I didn’t regret telling him no or ordering him to leave, the entire scene still haunted me.
Bale owned my thoughts.
No matter how much vodka I’d consumed last night, I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t close my eyes out of fear. I couldn’t even log in to Lush’s live feed and busy myself with what was happening in the club.
I had no interest.
All I saw, all I felt, all I wanted …
Was him.
His love.
His protection.
His arms around me.
So, this was a new strategy I was going to try. I would shave off at least a minute on my typical mile, pushing my body to its limits, and with my feet hitting the pavement and the thick, humid air filling my lungs and the hint of sun just starting to come through the sky, I would physically shove this man out of my head.
He didn’t deserve my thoughts.
My attention.
The reason I was in this situation in the first place was because of him.
Except I was already two miles in, and nothing had changed.
I still felt him.
I still saw him in my head.
I still wished it had all gone down differently—that I wasn’t on the verge of losing everything, that he hadn’t been hired by the people who wanted to take me down—so we could be together.
Because—oh God—Bale Pierce was beyond perfect for me.
But that didn’t matter.
He couldn’t be mine.
That opportunity was long gone, and I would never see or hear from him again.
The realization made my lungs heave, and it wasn’t because of my speed or the distance I’d gone so far. It had nothing to do with the heaviness in the air either.
