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“I… uh… I actually met someone.”
Her eyes go wide. “Ooooh?”
I debated whether or not I was going to say anything to her about Erin, but truth be told, I’m crazy about this woman, and I want to scream it from the rooftops.
“Yeah. Her name is Erin.”
“She one of the local college girls?”
I shake my head. “No, actually, she’s a little older than me.”
She gives me the classicmotherlook. “Tanner James… how much older? You haven’t bagged yourself a cougar, have you?”
Rob and I both look at my mother like she’s lost her mind. “Mother!” I cry. “No, she’s not a cougar. She’s only thirty-three.”
She uses her fingers to count the years between us before saying, “Oh, that’s not that bad.”
“What does she do for a living?”
“She works at a dentist office.”
“When do we get to meet her?” She croons.
Here’s the thing. My mother has never beenthismother. She always cared about her boys, but she was never all that invested as a mom. She only half paid attention to our grades and always tried to be more of a friend than a mom. Growing up, that had its pros and its cons. Now that we are grown, she tries to fall more into the motherly role.
I don’t mind it, I guess, but it’s strange. When I was a teenager, and I told her I was dating someone, she would just tell me to wear a condom.
“I don’t know,” I say. “It’s a little complicated.”
“Uh-oh. What’s wrong with her?”
“Nothing,” I defend. “But she has kids.”
“Kids? As in plural?”
I nod. “Yeah, three boys.”
That motherly look is back, and I’m betting I’m not going to like what she’s going to say next. “Now, son, what do you know about dating a woman with three kids?”
“Ha!” I blurt. “Do you not see the irony in that statement? You dated every guy in the world when YOU had three kids. I’m pretty sure you didn’t make them fill out a survey on how qualified they were to take on that role.”
“Exactly. And I probably should have. I think that I would know a thing or two about this. I dated a whole slew of men who didn’t know the first thing about dating a woman with kids.”
“And Iwatchedyou date all those guys. Don’t you think that I picked up some tips on hownotto act?” I feel myself raising my voice, but I try to calm down. No matter how upset I may be getting, I don’t think it’s appropriate to yell at my mother.
She rubs her fingers along the lines on her forehead. “Tanner, all I’m saying is that it’s a big undertaking. And you’re on the road ninety percent of the time. Not to mention the fact that you blow through money like it’s your job.”
“I’m sorry,” I interrupt. “Is this some sort of intervention for how awful you think I am?”
“Not at all. I think you’re a wonderful man, and I’m so proud of you. I know how much you want to be a husband and a father. I’m just worried that you’re trying to skip to the end. Haven’t you always wanted kids of your own? Do you think a woman with three already is going to want to have more?”
“I don’t know, Momma. We haven’t talked about it.”
“That’s my point. Maybe you shouldn’t get serious with this woman until you have had these talks. If she doesn’t want to have more kids, are you okay with stepping in and playing daddy to the kids had with someone else?”
“They have a dad,” I defend. “He has them every other weekend.”
“And if you get with their mother, don’t you think that some of that burden will fall on you the other majority of the time thatshehas them? If you think that you won’t end up carrying a large part of the weight, you’re crazy.”
