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“Let’s end things here, before I fall even further. I think I might still be able to get over this. I think with time I can be your friend, the way you want me to be. But I can’t do that while we’re sleeping with each other. Every time you touch me, my heart races. Every time you kiss me, I fall a little deeper. I can’t do this anymore.”
Carter cups my cheeks and wipes my tears away with his thumbs. He looks devastated, but he isn’t telling me to stay. Instead, he just nods. I try my best to keep it together while my heart falls apart. I inhale deeply and try my best to smile.
“I’m going back to my dorm,” I murmur. “I think we can both do with a bit of space.”
I get dressed in a rush and turn toward the front door. Carter grabs my hand from behind before I reach it, and I turn back around, a tiny burst of hope lighting within.
“Stay,” he whispers. “Please, Emilia. Stay,”
I bite down on my lip and look into his eyes. He looks torn and anguished, and I hate that I put that expression on his face. “Why?” I ask. “Why should I stay?”
Carter looks at me and then glances away, letting go of my hand. I bite down on my lip as hard as I can to keep myself from bursting into tears.
“Forget what I told you today, Carter. I’ll get over it, okay? Don’t worry about it.”
I smile at him as brightly as I can and walk out of the door. Big fat ugly tears fall down my cheeks as soon as the door closes behind me. What was I thinking when we started off? How could I have thought for even a second that I’d walk out of this unscathed?
Chapter 28
Emilia
“You’ve been miserable all week. How long are you going to keep this up?” Kate says. “Didn’t you say that Mason was just a hook-up, anyway? It was bound to end at some point. You knew that, didn’t you?”
I glance up at her and take the tub of ice cream she’s handing me. “Yeah, I knew,” I whisper. I’m glad I won’t have to keep lying to her anymore. Since Carter and I are over now, I won’t have to keep coming up with excuses when she asks me where I am or what I’m up to. I won’t have to keep roping Mason into this endless web of lies. It’s better this way, for everyone.
Kate groans and pulls on my hand. “Come on. I can’t take much more of you being this miserable. The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else. Let’s go find you a rebound.”
I grimace. I can’t stomach the idea of sleeping with someone else. I just want Carter. Kate stares at me expectantly and I sigh. “I guess a drink won’t hurt, but I don’t want a rebound.”
She nods and walks to my wardrobe. I’m not at all surprised when she pulls out one of my sexiest dresses. “Go on, go shower. And for God’s sake, wash your hair.”
I groan and force myself out of bed and into the shower. I can’t help but think of Carter. Does he miss me? Has he replaced me yet? If it’s just sex he wanted from me, then he’s probably already found someone else to give him that. I wonder if what we had was special to him at all.
By the time I walk out of the shower, Kate is dressed, her hair and makeup done perfectly. I glance at the makeup and hair styling tools she’s got laid out and sigh. She’s totally going to do a full makeover on me. I sit down and let her do whatever the hell she wants while I sip the vodka mixer she hands me. It doesn’t take her long at all, and by the time she’s done, the bags underneath my eyes are barely visible.
“Come on,” she says, grabbing my hand. “One of my friends is throwing a party in the woods. I’ve been a few times, and it’s always wild. I think it’s just what you need.”
I frown at her. “A party in the woods? Why does this sound like the start of a horror movie?”
Kate rolls her eyes and drags me along. By the time we get there, I’m already eager to leave, but I don’t want to let Kate down. She greets countless people that don’t look remotely familiar to me and I honestly can’t even introduce myself. I just want to go home and watch a chick flick in bed. Preferably with an entire pint of ice cream.
Kate hands me a drink and I take it from her eagerly. Maybe a drink or two might breathe some life back into me, but I doubt it. Kate looks at me with pity and shakes her head.
“Cheer up, okay?” she murmurs, and I nod, unsure how else to reply. If I could’ve cheered up, I would’ve done it long ago. I don’t really enjoy feeling this way either.
“Jake!” Kate yells, and I narrow my eyes. I don’t like this guy. Jake walks up to us and wraps his arms around her. He looks genuinely excited to see her, and I feel bad for hating him on sight, when he’s done nothing to deserve that.
“This is Emilia,” she says. Jake looks at me and smiles before turning back to Kate.
“Your best friend?” he asks, and she nods. Jake takes another look at me and smiles lecherously. I look away and take back the remorse I felt for judging him too early. He’s clearly a pig.
Jake wraps his arm around me and I take a step away, throwing my own arm around Kate instead. She smiles up at me, but her smile is forced, and I feel guilty immediately. I didn’t do anything to cause Jake to behave that way, so why does she look annoyed with me.
“She’s a bit heartbroken. I thought she could do with a bit of fun,” Kate says.
Jake’s eyes roam over my body, and he grins. “Fun, huh?”
Kate stiffens and I look away awkwardly. She clears her throat and looks at him with raised brows, and he snaps out of it. “What the hell is with him?” I whisper into her ear.
