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“Well, if you know what’s good for you, you won’t mention a damn thing about you and Scar right now. You break my sister’s heart, when she’s still recovering, and I’ll rip yours from your chest with my bare hands.”
“The last thing I wanna do is hurt Maddie. You should know that. Just because I’m not in love with her doesn’t mean I don’t care about her.”
“Well,” he simpers, “you tell her about you and Scar and it’ll hurt like hell.”
“I’m not talking about that right now. Besides, it’s really none of your business. Maddie is an adult now and you can’t protect her heart forever.”
Neo rubs the back of his neck, staring down at the floor. “I can try my damnedest.”
“Look. This conversation isn’t about Maddie, or even Scar. It’s about you and the way you treat the people you care about.”
“Care about?” He scoffs. “What makes you think I care about either of you? No one gives a damn about me. Why should I care about any of you?”
“You don’t give anyone a chance. You try to steal everyone’s happiness, just to give yourself a moment of your own. Well, how’s it feel? You happy now?”
He rolls his neck, brows dipped low in a heavy scowl. “No. I’m not fucking happy. I don’t even know what happiness feels like anymore, Crew. At least, I didn’t, until tonight.”
Jagger straightens his back, and it’s clear he’s fighting the urge to deck him again. “There it is. Trying to rub this shit in our faces again.”
“You think that’s what I’m doing right now? Rubbing it in your face that I just destroyed your girl’s heart? That’s not what I’m doing.” Neo walks over to the entryway into the living room and stops, both hands pressed to the frame, and he drops his head. “I didn’t know what happiness felt like anymore, until tonight, because I found out exactly what itdoesn’tfeel like. And it sure as hell wasn’t happiness I felt when I blew her world apart.”
His hands fall to his sides and he walks sluggishly through the doorway, disappearing into the living room.
I look at Jagger, who’s just as stunned as I am. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but was that almost…sincere?”
Jagger scratches his head, and his shoulders rise. “I’ve got no idea what to think when it comes to that guy.”
* * *
My stomach isin a ball of tightly-knitted knots. The weight of the guilt I’ve carried all these months is suddenly unbearable. I raise my hand to knock, but my movements freeze. Then I drop my hand back down.
I’ve done a lot of people wrong in my life, and it’s usually no problem for me to keep walking with my head held high. There are a select few who I take my walls down for and Maddie is one of them, along with Jagger, Neo, and of course, Scar. It doesn’t matter that Maddie and I will never be, what matters is that she’s always been one of my best friends. Part of me thinks I stayed with her so long out of fear of losing that friendship, along with Neo’s. But I can’t live in fear anymore. Life’s too short to settle with someone who doesn’t light a fire inside you. Scar lit that fire years ago, and while the flame may have flickered from time to time, it never went out.
You’ve gotta do this, Crew. Just go in. You’re not going in there to see a girlfriend or an ex. You’re going to see one of your best friends.
I knock my knuckles softly on the door.
“Come in.”
The sound of her voice hitting my ears is like music—reminding me of a song she loved to listen to, “Drops of Jupiter”by Train. And when I push the door open and I see her sitting there, it’s affirmed that she’s returned from her stay on the moon. “Hey, gorgeous.”
She smiles, and I find myself doing the same. “Hi, Crew.”
The weight slowly lifts as I cross the room to an empty chair beside the wheeled one she’s currently sitting in.
I nod toward the chair before sitting down. “Do you mind?”
Her arms spread wide. “Do I get a hug first?”
“Yeah. Of course.” I lean down, wrapping her up in a hug. She feels so fragile in my arms, but she looks the same. Her hair is longer, and her cheekbones are more pronounced, which I assume is from being tube-fed nutrients for so long. But, other than that, she’s the same Maddie I’ve always known.
I pull back and grab the chair, spinning it around in front of her and sitting on it backward. My arms lay on the backrest. “How have you been feeling?”
“Bored.” She snorts. “So damn bored. What I wouldn’t give to be on my feet and play a childish game of hide-and-seek right about now.”
I laugh. “Those were the days.”
“How about you? How are you doing?”
